Ask HN: "Dumbing yourself down" around your peers?

After doing it for so long, I've realized it's not an easy problem to deal with. I think that you have a fairly accurate interpretation of what I'm trying to convey. I'm glad you posted about how you've attempted to deal with it (even though the "fix" may just have been a pleasant side-effect of moving for another reason). I've considered relocating, but I also like my friends. So to me, this is sort of ditching them and finding other people to be around. This could of course just be me trying to rationalize away unpleasant options but knowing myself it's also an indication of the difficulty of the problem.

FWIW, I have a LOT of different interests, and I get really cheesed off by one group of nerdy friends who are anxious to put down anything popular but am similarly frustrated by normal people who won't branch out of their comfort zone and look at the world through a different lens.

I'm not a computer buff by trade or training but I suspect this is a problem that has nothing to do with intelligence. It often seems to have more to do with not wanting to admit to knowing/not knowing about something so as not to appear too 'different'. I think it's a rut one can get out of through travelling/ moving/working somewhere new, because being suddenly forced to make new friends as an adult can encourage honesty and a re-evaluation of what is important.

Good luck, however you choose to tackle this problem.

http://www.artofproblemsolving.com/Resources/AoPS_R_A_Calcul...

That generalizes to how to live in adult life. Seek out the smartest people you can find, and spend time interacting with them.

This, of course, is what I like about HN. My happiest time of social life growing up was two years in junior high in Minnesota in which I was "tracked" with mostly very bright fellow students. Most of the rest of my life I've been trying to regain a social circle like that. Now I'm most of the way back to where I was almost four decades ago, with lots of friends who are plainly very smart, who get my jokes, and who understand my vocabulary.

I find that technical people, developers/hackers etc. can often be incredibly annoying when they do this. Many also have a tendency to call other developers idiots or constantly talk about their skills. It's really not a great way to make people think highly of you, either professionally or socially.

the way i see it is that between people, we want to communicate ideas. in order to communicate we have to meet at a shared context, and shared semiotics. the way i'm writing this is not how i would talk to someone at work. the way i talk at work is not how i would talk to my mom. the way i talk to my mom is not how i would talk with my housemate. the way i talk about a problem with a designer is not the way i talk about a problem with an engineer. the way i talk about a problem with an engineer is not the way i talk when discussing philosophy.

if you value comprehension, and you value growth, then you are in the minority of our society - especially when it comes to comprehension. it's easier to find people trying to win than to find people trying to comprehend. since you value learning and growing, you will accelerate as will others like you, beyond the understandings common in our society. your context will diverge more so from shared contexts, simply because you are internally growing. don't fret - just communicate what needs to be communicated. some people may not be interested in some of the things your interested in, and others will be. run into brilliant people with shared interests, sure it might be exciting, but you'll still need to communicate - you'll still need to meet with words, body language, and smiles - you're experience is entirely your own. we are all alone, together.