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Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

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Re: Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

#81

Post by aspyct »

mablopoule wrote: post #30
aspyct wrote: post #5

It took me around 25 years to figure out that the piece of clothing we call in french a "pullover" (yes, say that with a strong french accent) is actually an English word describing how you physically put on the piece of clothing. It's hard to describe how much this felt like a french word for all this time. To be honest, I even thought it was local jargon... We typically call it a "pull". Everyone does it, it's the…

Oh, nice. On french words I got way too late, there is the fact that "Gendarme" (a kind of policeman) is "gens d'arme" (people of weapon) And also, thinking about the word "Breakfast", as in "Breaking the fast", I realize that the french "Déjeuner" is also literally "Dé - jeûner".

Oh...

Well, took me 34 years for this one I guess -_-'

Re: Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

#82

Post by rramadass »

iancmceachern wrote: post #78
rramadass wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am not sure whether you understood my comment in the way intended. Reality exists distinct and separate from the Perceiver's unique Perception of it (which exists only at a point in Time and might change). Therefore he would need to validate his Perception so that it is in sync with Reality or suffer consequences. Perception cannot be conflated with Reality. This is why platitudes like "Good Things happen to Good P…

That's exactly it. Saying "good things happen to good people" to yourself over and over throughout your life helps many people to have and maintain a good attitude. So it does have an effect.

Not what i meant at all :-)

To elaborate;

Having a good attitude helps in dealing with bad things in the short term only and many times not at all and one would still need to face up to "reality" and change the "objective bad things" outside of our perception.

Attitudes are basically a coping mechanism (short term and context specific) and not a solution to "The Problem".

As an example, no amount of "Good Thoughts and Good Attitudes" is going to help a starving person deal with the reality of figuring out how to feed himself.

Re: Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

#83

Post by iancmceachern »

rramadass wrote: post #82
iancmceachern wrote: post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's exactly it. Saying "good things happen to good people" to yourself over and over throughout your life helps many people to have and maintain a good attitude. So it does have an effect.

Not what i meant at all :-) To elaborate; Having a good attitude helps in dealing with bad things in the short term only and many times not at all and one would still need to face up to "reality" and change the "objective bad things" outside of our perception. Attitudes are basically a coping mechanism (short term and context specific) and not a solution to "The Problem". As an example, no amount of "Good Thoughts an…

I know it's not what you meant, I'm trying to get you to open your mind.

We are social beings. So imagine two starving people, one has a good attitude, one doesn't. The one with the good attitude is more likely to be admitted and kept in the good graces of a social network that helps them when starving, the other is not. So the good attitude helps in this thought experiment. The issue with your thought experiment is that it takes each man as an island.

We don't exist in a vacuum, we are not islands.

Re: Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

#84

Post by rramadass »

iancmceachern wrote: post #83
rramadass wrote: post #82

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not what i meant at all :-) To elaborate; Having a good attitude helps in dealing with bad things in the short term only and many times not at all and one would still need to face up to "reality" and change the "objective bad things" outside of our perception. Attitudes are basically a coping mechanism (short term and context specific) and not a solution to "The Problem". As an example, no amount of "Good Thoughts an…

I know it's not what you meant, I'm trying to get you to open your mind. We are social beings. So imagine two starving people, one has a good attitude, one doesn't. The one with the good attitude is more likely to be admitted and kept in the good graces of a social network that helps them when starving, the other is not. So the good attitude helps in this thought experiment. The issue with your thought experiment is…

Attitudes only help in oiling the Social Machinery and is not an excuse to live in "Fantasy Land". That is why we have phrases like "Toxic Positivity", "Irrational Exuberance (in general)" etc. to characterize "feel good" platitudes taken too far. One cannot escape the effects of a distinct and separate "Reality".

Your take on my example does not make sense. In extreme cases like starvation, destitution, homelessness etc. aid workers don't rank the needy on a "attitude scale"; they simply provide the needed services to alleviate immediate suffering in order of priority if applicable.

I think you are trying to argue the inarguable. The reason i feel so strongly about these kinds of platitudes is because they have a) not solved the problem b) caused more harm then good due to wrong interpretations and applications.

As another direct example from HN threads; many people are disheartened because of not being able to land a job in spite of having gone through hundreds of applications and interviews. Here again it is far more important to help them evaluate themselves dispassionately (eg. lack of needed skills, bad communication, non-existent networking etc.) vis-a-vis the competition/market needs/etc. in a clear-eyed manner than just asking them to "be positive" and leaving them with a pat on the back. You need Actionable items and not merely Advice.

Re: Ask HN: What simple facts have you learned surprisingly late in life?

#85

Post by lowkey »

mablopoule wrote: post #30
aspyct wrote: post #5

It took me around 25 years to figure out that the piece of clothing we call in french a "pullover" (yes, say that with a strong french accent) is actually an English word describing how you physically put on the piece of clothing. It's hard to describe how much this felt like a french word for all this time. To be honest, I even thought it was local jargon... We typically call it a "pull". Everyone does it, it's the…

Oh, nice. On french words I got way too late, there is the fact that "Gendarme" (a kind of policeman) is "gens d'arme" (people of weapon) And also, thinking about the word "Breakfast", as in "Breaking the fast", I realize that the french "Déjeuner" is also literally "Dé - jeûner".

My favorite French word is Mortgage. Funnily enough this is the word used in English but not in French. The French have a separate word for a loan backed by property - Hypotheque.

My guess is that the reason for this is that the original French word hits too close to home. Mort-Gage literally means Death Pledge.

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