Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

Post by YeGoblynQueenne » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 7:10 PM UTC

Moru wrote: post #673

nzealand wrote: post #365

A software engineer, a priest, and a doctor are trying to enjoying a round of golf. Ahead of them is a group playing so slowly and inexpertly that in frustration the three ask the greenkeeper for an explanation. “That’s a group of blind firefighters,” they are told. “They lost their sight saving our clubhouse last year, so we let them play for free.” The priest says, “I will say a prayer for them tonight.” The doctor…

Haha, yes, that is so typical us programmers. We always know best and ofcourse there is a simple solution that fixes everything without even having to code a single line. But what if they enjoy the feeling of the sun on the skin while golfing? What if they are not completely blind but can see dark/light shades? This makes it much easier to keep balance.

Post by kyriakos » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 7:23 PM UTC

dharmab wrote: post #28

A QA engineer walks into a bar and orders a beer. She orders 2 beers. She orders 0 beers. She orders -1 beers. She orders a lizard. She orders a NULLPTR. She tries to leave without paying. Satisfied, she declares the bar ready for business. The first customer comes in an orders a beer. They finish their drink, and then ask where the bathroom is. The bar explodes.

Post by w0mbat » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 7:47 PM UTC

berkes wrote: post #374

shimonabi wrote: post #197

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In my car, I have to disconnect the battery when the cheap 30$ Chinese radio freezes.

I have a 37 year old car. The (classic looking) Bluetooth radio is by far the most complicated electronics on board. When I switch off the car, for safety, anti-theft and leaking, the battery is disconnected entirely with a key. The radio looses everything: paired devices, position of radio tuner, volume, BT/aux/radio mode etc. Whenever you start the car, you'll need to mash at least five buttons and knobs to either…

Post by kasztelan22 » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 8:13 PM UTC

mbrevda1 wrote: post #767

jchw wrote: post #544

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well, I can at least tell for sure that I’m on Hacker News, now. :)

That's technically correct, but ultimately useless, information

Post by kcartlidge » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 8:21 PM UTC

sokoloff wrote: post #545

ralusek wrote: post #531

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think without actually getting into the 10x debate regarding engineers, we can all agree that there are definitely 10x comedians.

Analogous to programming, the average joke-teller just isn’t that funny, making 10x more achievable. “Think of a comedian.” There probably isn’t a 10x that comedian for you. “Find the first person to tell you a joke live next week; considering them as a proxy for average, there is almost surely a 10x comedian out there.”