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Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

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Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#71

Post by drw85 »

I was stuck in this avoidance cycle for a while and it slowly extended to pretty much everything i was doing. From going to the supermarket, to making a phone call. Most things seemed pretty much impossible for me to do and caused anxiety and panic attacks.

I did two years of therapy, which helped me better understand and analyse my behaviour, bit not much with the actual anxiety.

My wife then recommended a book to me (Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks), you can read it for free if you get the Amazon kindle trial.

It basically describes 4 steps to follow whenever you have anxiety/panic, to accept it and in turn calm your nervous system.

It helped me a lot and made me able to cope and live with the problem. So, i can go out again and do things, which still causes me anxiety from time to time, but i can deal with it and move along and actually enjoy whatever i'm doing as soon as the symptoms/negative feelings pass.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#73

Post by delanded »

impendia wrote: post #66
hprotagonist wrote: post #34

The easiest advice i have for you is still very hard. You must move beyond your shame and guilt that keeps you afraid and alone, and you must have a regular two-way relationship with a community of your peers and betters that you all use to help each other out of these sorts of blocking situations. You may well fail if you try…alone. But where you’re weak, someone else is strong, and vice versa. Exploit this. This is…

May I ask where you have sought out such communities? Not OP, but I've had limited success finding others interested in talking about mental health.

- Burner communities (centered around burning man and wordlwide around local burns) - Men's circles

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#75

Post by eof »

jotm wrote: post #48
eof wrote: post #38

Did anyone else say drugs? The only thing that’s ever worked for me is working on things I’m truly interested in, crushing anxiety due to a deadline coming up, and drugs. Getting adult adhd diagnosis in my late 30s has been life changing. Make sure your goals are your own and your tasks meet the goals.

Took me years, but I finally started buying stimulants illegally and yeah, they're life changing. They're not the ultimate solution, only useful when I need to focus on something and just do it™, but it's the perfect tool to train my brain. I can see now why kids are put on Adderall/etc then they stop taking them in adulthood. It always seemed very strange to me, but yeah, they help create habits that will stick for…

In usa it is very easy to get prescribed. Obviously you would need to lie about your non-prescribed use but if you’re willing to get them illegally that shouldn’t be an issue.

There are prescribers online. Even with no insurance it’s about $5/day after paying the doctor, counselor, and prescription (using GoodRx coupon)

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#79

Post by ntauthority »

bowsamic wrote: post #54

I had anxiety for many years, and cured it by meditation. But what you speak of, for my personal experience, is not anxiety. Anxiety is when I am out and have too much coffee, and I feel like I'm going to pass out because the body feelings are causing me to freak out. Or I got too high and am panicking. It's an overreaction to sensations and experiences that I am unfamiliar with. What you talk about, that crushing fe…

I would agree, to the extent that terminology may matter - it ideally wouldn't.

This scenario OP sketches sounds an awful lot like it can be extrapolated to 'no matter whether I try and fail, or don't try and fail, I'll fail anyway. as such, why even try?' which may indeed match the hopelessness associated with depression more, which may itself trigger more acute anxiety when trying anyway.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#80

Post by Overtonwindow »

I have severe ADHD, with anxiety that almost feels like a fear of success.

What helps me is to view everything like a vortex. If I have a paper to write I start on the outer edge of the vortex.

I open a word document, then I go do something else. I come back to it and maybe type the title. Then later I come back and type the outline. I don’t try to do it all at one time, I just tried bite sized incremental improvements. Literally turn on the computer, open word, those type of small things

Then eventually with enough visits, enough small increments of productivity, I’ll fall into the center of the vortex and just do the paper.

Like one of those things you see in the shopping malls in America were you put a quarter in, and it spins around until it gets to the center of the vortex and falls in the hole.

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