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Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

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Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#611

Post by vidarh »

NeverFade wrote: post #437
TwoBit wrote: post #427

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Most startup CEOs don't make much. Are there really very many VCs out there?

> Most startup CEOs don't make much. Depends on the startup and what stage it is. If it's a successful startup, then the CEO is sitting on a pile of stock that will likely be worth millions. If it's also a later stage startup, then likely he is making at least as much as his senior developers on top of that. Either way, he's a much better bet if you want to be a millionaire's wife some day. Also, executives typically…

I've had shares worth millions on paper that later turned out to be worthless many times... It really need to be a later stage startup with real traction for that to really mean anything.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#612

Post by xenihn »

glangdale wrote: post #494
cantrevealname wrote: post #358

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> make the most of it by progressing deliberately in your social life Ironically the Bay Area is among the worst places on Earth for improving your social life if you're straight and male. I noticed that you don't live in the Bay Area, you're married, you probably meant a much broader meaning of "social life", so your experiences are likely very different. But the typical clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respect…

I like how a guy earning a fairly unremarkable-when-we-adjust-for-cost-of-living salary with a bunch of fairly unimpressive table-stakes credentials: "clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respectful" (whaddaya want? a cookie?) is meant to be a Amazing Pussy Magnet. One of the major factors - aside from the gender ratio - behind tech guys not finding partners is this weird expectation that if they shave, clip their f…

Dating in the Bay Area as a male engineer with average (or worse) looks is extremely easy if you're a white (or white-passing) FAANG employee (or you work at any other company that is obviously paying you $300k+ in the bay) who is willing to date PRC citizens.

Gold-digging isn't relevant imo given that they also have tech incomes, and generally have rich families overseas to boot. I really don't understand why most guys here pass on them. The only reason I ever get from my friends when I ask is "I just don't like fobs". Whatever, more for me.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#613

Post by thrownaway954 »

md5wasp wrote: post #162

Hi there, I did the exact same thing as you (at Google Sydney), before eventually deciding that I must strike out into the wilderness. In the few years since I left; I worked as a solutions architect managing a team, a team lead, a remote dev, and now in a startup. Front-end, back-end, flip-side, all the ends. So I've been deliberately trying different angles of my career to see what suits. I'd describe this process…

"If you stay at Google, make the most of it by progressing deliberately in your social life. If I'd've stayed, I could have comfortably raised some kids with my wife by now - but that's still on the todo list."

THIS all the way.

When we are young, we think that we will be remembered by the company that we worked for and the people that we worked with. The sad truth is that in 99.9999% none of those people will remember you the second you walk out the door.

The family you raise will remember and love you though.

I'm in my 40s and got fired a very cushy job like OP has. The reason was cause I wanted to challenge myself and I worked myself into early alcoholism which resulted in my dismissal. My co-workers don't call, the company doesn't call, they don't care. My marriage broken up cause of the job and me wanting to pursue my so called dream. I'm alone and will most likely die alone this year by my own hand since the pain is too much bare sometimes. I miss my wife and my little Pomeranian terribly.

OP... if you want challenge in your life, challenge yourself to being a good partner to someone in a marriage and raise some kids, get a Pomeranian :) Have something in this world that will truly appreciate and remember you when you are gone.

"I never saw a tombstone that read. 'If I had only worked more'"

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#614

Post by NeverFade »

vidarh wrote: post #611
NeverFade wrote: post #437

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Most startup CEOs don't make much. Depends on the startup and what stage it is. If it's a successful startup, then the CEO is sitting on a pile of stock that will likely be worth millions. If it's also a later stage startup, then likely he is making at least as much as his senior developers on top of that. Either way, he's a much better bet if you want to be a millionaire's wife some day. Also, executives typically…

I've had shares worth millions on paper that later turned out to be worthless many times... It really need to be a later stage startup with real traction for that to really mean anything.

You and me both, man.

However, it's a different path for top executives versus the rest of us.

If you follow folks at that level, you'll notice that even when their startup fizzles, they tend to come out on top.

There are ways to get paid well at an exit even when your stock are nominally worthless. If you're an executive. Not to mention that if their startup was worth $100m+ at one point, they would likely get a chance to start another.

None of this is criticism, by the way: many of these guys worked harder and longer than most engineers.

They did get disproportionately compensated for it, though.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#615

Post by JumpCrisscross »

cantrevealname wrote: post #358
md5wasp wrote: post #162

Hi there, I did the exact same thing as you (at Google Sydney), before eventually deciding that I must strike out into the wilderness. In the few years since I left; I worked as a solutions architect managing a team, a team lead, a remote dev, and now in a startup. Front-end, back-end, flip-side, all the ends. So I've been deliberately trying different angles of my career to see what suits. I'd describe this process…

> make the most of it by progressing deliberately in your social life Ironically the Bay Area is among the worst places on Earth for improving your social life if you're straight and male. I noticed that you don't live in the Bay Area, you're married, you probably meant a much broader meaning of "social life", so your experiences are likely very different. But the typical clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respect…

> the Bay Area is among the worst places on Earth for improving your social life if you're straight and male

Why does social life only mean dating?

There are tons of social circles in the Bay Area. Hobbyist groups, aficionados of all stripes, non-profits galore and strange entertainment options. There is a diversity of bars and restaurants, and California’s unique outdoors are close.

Perhaps it would be more rewarding to focus on those, and be a little more passive when it comes to dating while you build up your interests.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#616

Post by adversaldoman »

ChuckNorris89 wrote: post #187
dhuyrv wrote: post #130

You remind me myself a few years ago: a talented, but bored slacker who didn't see any point in investing any energy into that project. Turns out I was right: the project didn't go anywhere after I left and investing any extra time would be a clueless thing to do. So what's changed since then? Have I found meaning in work? No! I've become a professional slacker who knows all these psychological tricks, knows what bod…

This blows my mind that in the US one can make such insane money in tech while still being a slacker and retire early with a dream house bought and paid for while in Europe devs are slaving away through SCRUM powered meat grinders burning themselves out for a 3% salary increase on a pitiful 40-80k/year, no stock options, without any hope of early retirement or owning a decent home without a 30 year loan or financial…

For what it's worth, these jobs do exist in Europe as well (I'm slacking off at a 100k+ € swe job in central europe right now!). I had high paying offers from the US in the past, but in my opinion the higher overall living standards, smaller wage gaps, and better social/political structures more than outweigh potential earning benefits.

In any case: If you're willing to move, consider eg Zurich, where a lot of big, high paying companies (google, FB, ibm, Oracle, apple, ... ) are hiring. Very high standard of living, very low taxes. London is similarly plastered with high paying jobs. Berlin has tons of interesting startups. Paris is great and has good food. Last time I was job hunting, I got high paying offers in all of those cities, so it is definitely possible

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#617

Post by JumpCrisscross »

NeverFade wrote: post #366
cantrevealname wrote: post #358

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> make the most of it by progressing deliberately in your social life Ironically the Bay Area is among the worst places on Earth for improving your social life if you're straight and male. I noticed that you don't live in the Bay Area, you're married, you probably meant a much broader meaning of "social life", so your experiences are likely very different. But the typical clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respect…

> But the typical clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respectful, male SWE in the Bay Area making $120K+ a year in his 20s or 30s, who should be a magnet for women, turns out to be living in one of worst places because of male-female ratios among singles (and some other cultural factors). Yes, it's quite simple: there are many more men in the Bay than women, so women have their pick, and they can afford to raise th…

> it's quite simple: there are many more men in the Bay than women

I’m in Manhattan. The single sex ratio is reversed. (More single women than men.)

Male FAANG employee rants about how they should be magnets for women, but can’t find a date because something is wrong with all women, are equally prevalent here.

They’re all (a) the same rant and (b) as boring as the last one.

There’s a selection effect among well-paid software engineers at large tech companies that explains more of this than local statistics. That or these jobs turn interesting people into those who believe they should be magnets for the opposite sex, which tends to be a turn-off for most people.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#618

Post by himinlomax »

cantrevealname wrote: post #358
md5wasp wrote: post #162

Hi there, I did the exact same thing as you (at Google Sydney), before eventually deciding that I must strike out into the wilderness. In the few years since I left; I worked as a solutions architect managing a team, a team lead, a remote dev, and now in a startup. Front-end, back-end, flip-side, all the ends. So I've been deliberately trying different angles of my career to see what suits. I'd describe this process…

> make the most of it by progressing deliberately in your social life Ironically the Bay Area is among the worst places on Earth for improving your social life if you're straight and male. I noticed that you don't live in the Bay Area, you're married, you probably meant a much broader meaning of "social life", so your experiences are likely very different. But the typical clean cut, well-spoken, hard working, respect…

> respectful

Serious question: why do you think being "respectful" has any positive correlation with being a magnet for women?

I can't prove the "chicks digs bad boys" cliché is scientifically accurate, but as the only convict I personally know is both objectively ugly AND a magnet to girls half his age, I am pretty sure the converse is wrong.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#619

Post by JumpCrisscross »

philosopher1234 wrote: post #561
X6S1x6Okd1st wrote: post #512

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Totally agree. Being interesting as a human and working on yourself is so much better than trying to get credit for being "respectful". That's like saying: "look I shower every day!" Be interesting.

What do you personally do to be interesting?

> What do you personally do to be interesting?

People who do what they enjoy and try new things, instead of trying to be interesting, tend to be interesting.

Re: Ask HN: I've been slacking off at Google for 6 years. How can I stop this?

#620

Post by peteretep »

EdwardDiego wrote: post #501
ahs1 wrote: post #480

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Apolitical answer: Markets prefer political stability. Average annual S&P 500 returns are around ~7% adjusted for inflation, but ~12% when a President is in his second term. Political answer: A Trump loss would be presumably be to one of the self-avowed socialists running which would certainly crash the markets. Furthermore, even without a market crash, a socialist implementing mark-to-market capital gains taxation w…

> A Trump loss would be presumably be to one of the avowed socialists running Oh bless, the tendency in the US towards labelling people still right of the centre by most countries' standards as "socialists" for being left of the Republicans is cute.

Further up in the thread he said he wanted to live in the USA because it’s a Free Country too, so I’m assuming he’s not being entirely serious.
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