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Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

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Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#61

Post by thenaturalist »

hirvi74 wrote: post #39
thenaturalist wrote: post #9

Hey there, M33, got diagnosed adult with late 31, so take what I say with a grain of salt. I have immediately had access to both medication as well as ADHD focussed psychotherapy. ADHD is the best treatable neurological condition of all with medication and if you can have access to where you live, it's the first route I'd try to access. Once you have access to meds, nobody can require you to take them as prescribed t…

> ADHD focussed psychotherapy How does anyone even find this? I find there is a lot of signal vs. noise in this realm of care. What I mean, many professionals list that they treat ADHD, when it's clearly apparent they only list that for marketing purposes. The actual care provided is either antithetical or completely unhelpful -- at least for me. For example, of the many psychotherapist I have seen, I would often be…

I live in Berlin, and the therapist I found was experienced, i.e. very familiar with common patterns and psychological problems (long term depression caused by adverse life effects, masking, rejection sensitivity, executive dysfunction) in late diagnosed adults.

Working with that person was invaluable for me.

That said, I met them through a personal referral of another ADHD friend and have met several other psychologists before in life with whom I never clicked.

Online services should make finding a good therapist easier accessible than ever before.

All as I can say is if it doesn't feel right, it isn't. No biggie. Keep looking and seek out another person.

You'll know if you found someone with whom it works cause there'll be clear progress early on.

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#62

Post by dmacedo »

kfreds wrote: post #28

> The diagnosis is not a complete surprise but it is hard on him. My understanding of available evidence is that an ADHD diagnosis isn't helpful for everyone. This is partly due to societal stigma and lack of understanding of what ADHD is. I can highly recommend Russell Barkley as a source of scientific information on the subject. > He has always had problems concentrating at school, for instance he is good at math b…

I would echo this and share with the parents: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCAGc-rkIfo

Also Russell Barkley has since fully retired though has been very active in diaseminating what's happening in (good and bad) research, plus other lectures on https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0tLWu7ljYVFPiZQfHjTMsA

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#63

Post by purple-leafy »

bdangubic wrote: post #43
dyauspitr wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Honestly literally anyone’s life is improved by a low dose of speed. And by improved I mean fit into our societies’s version of successful.

human nature is such that one cannot ever stay on low dose of any drug that feels good… this is why drug dealers will always give you “a taste” for free - they know you will be calling for more and more

completely wrong :)

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#64

Post by purple-leafy »

Good god there are a shit tonne of morons in this thread. Please do not listen to these morons pushing an agenda about "medication bad".

ADHD is a difficult diagnosis. I have it. I have struggled with my mind since I was young, now early 30s with a diagnosis a few months prior.

Medication has been the most effective route, and has amplified all my good qualities and allows me to relax and focus, rather than being extremely overwhelmed and unable to focus.

The difference in my happiness is night and day on medication.

ADHD is one of the "best" "issues" to have, in that the medication for it is super effective and has minimal side-effects. Also, you only get an ADHD diagnosis if it is causing issues. ADHD is a spectrum etc.

You can do all the self-help in the world, without medication it is hard to overcome the major issues (relationships/mood).

With the medication, you can build healthier habits, which in turn allow you to use the medication less :)

Good luck

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#65

Post by xlii »

getwiththeprog wrote: post #52
xlii wrote: post #23

Depending on how severe your nephews ADHD is (and it can go from borderline ADHD to severe mixed type) it might be worth doing sleep training, eating training, stimuli training etc. In all cases I would recommend multiple psychological education courses. Sports and diet are very important - protein rich diet has protective effect on neurological system (doesn’t mean only proteins but make sure that healthy amount is…

Raising diet is very important. Eating fast foods and drinking sodas daily will make a teeanger exhibit ADHD type symptoms. Many people do not think that caffiene is in colas, or energy drinks and etc. Poor diet has become so normalized that a doctor might not even ask about it.

It really depends on the environment I suppose. Caffeine is a stimulant so it’s common for ADHD bearers to self-medicate in it (my former associate, later diagnosed, used to drink full - 300ml - of espresso brewed coffee in the morning).

Sodas in my personal opinion is a different issue. While sugar content is no longer linked to ADHD symptoms it pushes out nutrients - and Omega-3 acids, proteins etc. have positive effect.

I have made a personal “experiment on a child”. Ensuring at least single egg or a single sausage is eaten during the breakfast (i.e. approx. 5-10 grams of proteins) decreased number of fights at school started by friend’s son (previously breakfasts were primarily carbs).

It’s possible to manage ADHD with small changes, that’s why education is the most important.

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#66

Post by trod1234 »

thenaturalist wrote: post #57
trod1234 wrote: post #45

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Don't give drugs, they can permanently mess up his mind. This is common and good advice. Ritalin at one point was prescribed for ADD and ADHD, Kurt Cobain ended up dying by suicide as a result of complications from his use of the drug. Spectrum disorders have been used for the past 20+ years as catchall diagnoses. There have been many stories of people who were diagnosed with these disorders, when in fact they were…

Do you have any sources for what you claim to be fact here? Cause it sure as hell goes way against common research. > This is common and good advice. No it is not. To be clear: This is equivalent to saying: Don't get vaccinated, vaccines don't work. Or: The earth is flat. It is unscientific and plain wrong.

[dead]

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#67

Post by trod1234 »

thenaturalist wrote: post #60
trod1234 wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Did you mean to say there is a high noise floor with little signal? A lot of spectrum disorder diagnoses are misdiagnoses for other (medical) things. The diagnoses are often used as a catchall when no one can figure it out. For example, chronic heavy metal poisoning mimicks ADHD or ADD diagnoses, blood tests alone are useless because its bound to tissue very quickly after exposure (and bioaccumulates unless a chelato…

I fail to see how your recurrent relativization of the existence of ADHD has anything to do with effective psychotherapist treatment of clear symptoms. Also, do you have reliable sources for this poisoning hypothesis?

Symptoms don't mean what you seem to think they mean.

Medical issues related to toxic exposure are medical issues, not something that can be resolved by psychotherapy.

See my other post on how to find those reliable sources, or just ask your doctor if this ever happens.

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#68

Post by annie_muss »

I was diagnosed in my thirties. I knew something was wrong much earlier but I never had any idea it was ADHD, let alone a diagnosis.

Above all: treat him as an individual. There are a lot of stereotypes about ADHD that don’t really match how I experience it. Images of kids running around, can’t sit still, loud and disruptive. None of these were true for me. I was swimming in my own imagination all the time. I’m also extremely sensitive emotionally. I still have to be very careful managing my emotions. One unkind phrase can send can send me spiraling into depression or blind with rage (thankfully I am able to manage it a lot better these days).

Another tip is to work with the ADHD, not against it. If something isn’t working then change it up. Novelty can be a big motivator for people with ADHD. Maybe this means you have a new calendar system every 2 months? Accept it, run with it and enjoy it. Sure, it might be easier to use the same calendar system but that doesn’t work with the condition.

Focus on controlling the micro environment, not the macro environment. Should he go into medicine, law or engineering? Any of those could work well. But the way you succeed in any of them is having the right micro-environment for studying. Short bursts, flashcards, games, active and interesting ways of learning. Again, when something doesn’t work, change it up.

Finally, be and friendly, loving and guilt free as you possibly can. When I was younger I piled the guilt on myself. I was constantly upset that I wasn’t studying enough, wasn’t succeeding, wasn’t following the right path. All this guilt just led to avoidant behavior and worse outcomes. Whenever anything goes wrong try to face is as a curious scientist. What went wrong, how can we do it better next time? The guilt never helps.

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#69

Post by bdangubic »

purple-leafy wrote: post #63
bdangubic wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

human nature is such that one cannot ever stay on low dose of any drug that feels good… this is why drug dealers will always give you “a taste” for free - they know you will be calling for more and more

completely wrong :)

there are always exception to the rule :)

Re: Ask HN: My 12 year-old nephew just got diagnosed with ADHD, any advice?

#70

Post by thenaturalist »

trod1234 wrote: post #67
thenaturalist wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I fail to see how your recurrent relativization of the existence of ADHD has anything to do with effective psychotherapist treatment of clear symptoms. Also, do you have reliable sources for this poisoning hypothesis?

Symptoms don't mean what you seem to think they mean. Medical issues related to toxic exposure are medical issues, not something that can be resolved by psychotherapy. See my other post on how to find those reliable sources, or just ask your doctor if this ever happens.

Syptoms in the context of ADHD mean exactly what I think they mean.

ADHD is irreversible, it's not something that can be reversed or goes away on its own.

There is literature on a link between fetal heavy metal exposure and ADHD development.

I can't find anything on neurotoxins "mimicking" ADHD.

Again, by the very biological definition of what happens in a brain on ADHD, this is not reversible. It's chronic.

Sources:

1: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/neurotoxicity

2: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36972880/

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