Trying to get happiness from external conditions instead of making it at home in my body through meditation and understanding.
Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
561–570 of 1001 posts
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#562Staying warm. In the winter, I used to stay warm by turning up the thermostat. Then I discovered (via HN) the Low-Tech Magazine article, "Insulation: first the body, then the home." [0] The article argued that it's much more efficient to focus on heating yourself rather than your whole living space. I invested in high-quality wool clothes that I wear in layers and warm slippers. Now, I keep my home about 5 degrees F…
I live in the midwest and cold is normal for a chunk of the year, but one thing always worse than cold: wind. After college at some point I splurged on a North Face jacket with the wind protection bit and it was eye popping how much more tolerable being outside became. I always go for a nicer coat/jacket now -- the value brands at the department stores don't always have the right technology. Good outdoor gear is spen…
There is no such thing as bad weather, only bad gear ;)
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#563Not telling my friends that I love them. I was 28 the first time a friend told me "I love you" in a pure friendship way (and while sober), and without being a part of a special situation. I've also done it afterwards, and because I had never told my friend i love them, it made the message even stronger. It feels wrong that we don't do this more often.
I don’t feel comfortable telling people I love them outside of a serious relationship, so this always makes me feel a touch weird. Like, my best friends, I love them in a sense I guess…but I wouldn’t say that. It just doesn’t feel natural to me. I’d characterize our relationship as close, and that I care about them a lot, but “love” isn’t something that comes to mind outside of my parents or someone I’ve been in a lo…
Try it :)
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#564Pasta and sauce are not meant to be separate. Once you cook the pasta, drain it, and immediately toss with the sauce. This is part of the reason it was meant to be al dente, to absorb and deliver the flavor of the sauce better. Unlike rice, it's fine to "soak" pasta in the sauce; it expands when freshly cooked but not when cool. Also most sauce recipes are probably overcomplicated. Most need less than 5 ingredients.…
Also, you don't have to boil the pasta for the full 8 minutes or whatever, just the first couple of minutes, then let it sit, eg https://www.barilla.com/en-gb/passive-cooking
Obvious in retrospect: once the water is boiling, any other increase of energy will only be used to evaporate the water. The temperature won't increase. And water can stay hot long enough to cook the pasta. Also less vapor in the environment.
I'll try it next time.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#565When my then-gf/now-wife and I first moved in together, I got really mad at her because she kept "hiding" my stuff when I left it out for more than a day. I couldn't find anything! At some point, I yelled, "It's like you don't even want to see any of my things when I'm not using them!" Then I stopped for a second. For the first time in my life, it made sense. The whole point of putting things away is to hide them! No…
Well, it is "looks neat" vs "there is space that is free, why not use it for stuff that you use often?"
Some people have mental disease that makes them annoyed where the flat surfaces are covered with immediately useful and easily accessible stuff and act up. "Oh look at those flat surfaces that don't get used for anything useful 99% of the time, how neat and tidy"
Some other kind of people have different disease of just leavin shit lying around for months and never use it, where it should be put back in storage (or bin) weeks ago already. "Don't touch my stuff, if you move it I won't remember where it is!" (then promptly forgets and wastes time searching thru clutter anyway.
Sane compromise is somewhere in the middle. Don't constantly hide the favourite knife every fucking day, ain't nobody got time for that shit. But probably clean it so the next time you use it you won't waste time on that. Cutting board can stay out, you use it every day, multiple times anyway.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#566Pasta and sauce are not meant to be separate. Once you cook the pasta, drain it, and immediately toss with the sauce. This is part of the reason it was meant to be al dente, to absorb and deliver the flavor of the sauce better. Unlike rice, it's fine to "soak" pasta in the sauce; it expands when freshly cooked but not when cool. Also most sauce recipes are probably overcomplicated. Most need less than 5 ingredients.…
> Unlike rice, it's fine to "soak" pasta in the sauce Risotto would like a word.
You still don't soak risotto, you keep the liquid content within limits.
Also different rices.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#567Pasta and sauce are not meant to be separate. Once you cook the pasta, drain it, and immediately toss with the sauce. This is part of the reason it was meant to be al dente, to absorb and deliver the flavor of the sauce better. Unlike rice, it's fine to "soak" pasta in the sauce; it expands when freshly cooked but not when cool. Also most sauce recipes are probably overcomplicated. Most need less than 5 ingredients.…
I really thought I hated spaghetti growing up. My parents would boil the noodles and then pour room temp sauce from a jar at the table individually. It was inedible. I was visiting a friend and had it all cooked together in the pan for the first time and it was eye opening.
This reminds me...
My parents were on the lower end of rural middle-class so on the rare occasion we went to a restaurant, steak was avoided as the most expensive thing on the menu, and as kids, we didn't have the option of steak anyway. Our meats while growing up were mainly fish, chicken, pork, and hamburger. When I was a teen, my mom got a deal on a big box of steaks somehow and cooked them on the grill every other night for dinner. She made it sound like we were living like royalty but no matter what kind of sauces or seasonings I slathered on, they were always dry and tasteless. I voluntarily skipped a lot of dinners that summer and thought I just hated steak.
In my mid-20s, I befriended a Brazilian. He invited my spouse and I over for a barbecue. When we got there, I found out the only thing going on the grill was steak, a.k.a. Brazilian Beef. Basically thick chunks of steak "marinated" in rock salt then cooked over open coals to sear the outside, but never long enough to get the inside more than medium-rare. I probably mentioned not caring for steak but he assured me I was going to like it. And wow, he was right. So tasty, so juicy. Decades later, I still make it every chance I get.
My wife and I sometimes talk about how our parents basically ruined whole categories of food for us until we got out into the world and experienced (or learned for ourselves) how things were _supposed_ to be cooked.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#568My doctor had me work on increasing the amount of water I drink in a day until I hit the recommended amount, and journaling the result. Turns out, I had spent most of my life dehydrated. I feel so much better when I drink a ton of water.
Curious. What changes have you observed from drinking more water.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#569Monopoly. If the player elects not to buy the property he lands on, it gets auctioned to the other players. This oft unfollowed rule makes the game 100x more fun when followed.
On the subject of monopoly, it's also interesting that it's roots are in a game created to teach the negative aspects of monopolies. The original game that modern monopoly is based on had two sets of rules, one that rewarded all players for wealth creation, and a second with the goal of creating a monopoly to crush opponents. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monopoly_(game)
I think the is a nice specific case of the general problem with mixing education and entertainment. Many have addressed this, but I like Postman’s ideas the most. If you give children educational television programs, you’re not teaching them to love learning, you’re teaching them to love television.
The Lindy-effect blessed methods are still just pen, paper, books, discussion, and debate.
Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?
#570When my then-gf/now-wife and I first moved in together, I got really mad at her because she kept "hiding" my stuff when I left it out for more than a day. I couldn't find anything! At some point, I yelled, "It's like you don't even want to see any of my things when I'm not using them!" Then I stopped for a second. For the first time in my life, it made sense. The whole point of putting things away is to hide them! No…
You know you’re in a long term relationship when your better half starts throwing away your stuff without asking.
What?
Never.
I never would do that and my wife never did this.