Ask HN: Advice that changed your life?

> I got my kids used to not caring about insults by actually insulting them. Things like "You are a moron!"

I do that too, although just because its fun rather than for any other reason. But your kids know that is friendly banter with you. It's quite different to your boss calling you a moron and insulting you all day.

So you might say, well if my boss did that then I'd leave, fuck them. And I'd be the same. However, not everyone is in a position to be able to just get out and quit.

And that doesn't even address the far more insidious ways people use words to hurt you. Telling other people you're a moron, building up an undeserved contempt. This is what bullies do and it's not so easy to shrug it off. When they get a significant number of people in on it then you can't escape it and feel like a fool. This is the source of my shyness and anxiety about talking to people. Even though I try to push down those feelings I still feel awkward and on guard because for a few of my school years ANYTHING I said unguarded would be pounced on and I'd be laughed at.

Then there's gaslighting and other verbal lead ons where you're sweet talked into believing you're a moron. I don't have any experience with this.

> The best approach is to turn those words into irrelevant noise. To go from that, to have words affect you for life? No, that's a big mistake.

I wish this were the case. Toot toot for you if it is, but for many it's not possible, I think perhaps you could take a more sympathetic view - what has worked for you does not work for everyone and perhaps others had a difficult time when they were more vulnerable to it and that left an unshakable impression on them.

I start with head rotations, than some arm rotations and stretching, then torso rotations, then stretching the legs by doing lunges (I think they're called), then doing 2 sets of 25 squats with a very wide stance and also stretch my wrist for the last 5 squats of each set, then 10 squats with legs together, then stretching the legs and back by bending forward and reaching for my toes when standing, then some balance, standing on one leg and lifting the other backwards in the air and arms wide apart (this doesn't do anything, but I like improving balance in that stance).

Overall it takes like 3-5 minutes, sometimes after I do some crunches for some core strength and to get the heart pumping.

The squats are the hardest part, and require most motivation, but doing squats in the morning is really good for blood flow (to the brain especially).

I always do the stretches as soon as I wake up, after going to the bathroom but usually before washing my teeth.