Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

Post by the_gipsy » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 11:17 AM UTC

lb1lf wrote: post #481

hutzlibu wrote: post #245

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thats a rehash of an old joke: I know it soviet style: A mathematician, a physicist and a biologist are flying in a air balloon and are lost. They encounter a man walking below: The biologist asks him: "do you know, where we are?" "..." the man looks up and says nothing The physicist ask him: "can you please tell us, where we are!" "..." after a while the man says: "in a balloon". The mathematician remarks, ah, he mu…

A Soviet engineer needs some plumbing done in his apartment, and calls for a plumber. The plumber arrives, does his thing, and hands over the bill. The engineer is shocked. -'What, this is like a quarter of what I make in a month - for half an hour's work???' Plumber shrugs. -'Well, why don't you come join us? Easy work, well paid, no responsibility - just remember to keep mum about your degree, as we're not supposed…

Post by devoutsalsa » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 11:22 AM UTC

Post by rottc0dd » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 11:28 AM UTC

hliyan wrote: post #478

avmich wrote: post #156

A programmer walks into a bar and ask for a drink. The bartender says I'll give you a drink if you tell me a programmer joke. And he says: a programmer walks into a bar and ask for a drink. The bartender says I'll give you a drink if you tell me a programmer joke. And he says: a programmer walks into a bar and ask for a drink. So he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink.

In a similar vein: One day a student came to Moon and said: “I understand how to make a better garbage collector. We must keep a reference count of the pointers to each cons.” Moon patiently told the student the following story: “One day a student came to Moon and said: ‘I understand how to make a better garbage collector...

Post by hamilyon2 » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 11:33 AM UTC

cirgue wrote: post #214

Someone else got downvoted to oblivion for this, though it deserves to be higher because it’s a classic: “I know a UDP joke, but I’m not sure you’ll get it”.

Post by grandchild » Thu, Jan 21, 2021, 11:38 AM UTC

tsimionescu wrote: post #353

There's an old Joel on Software one related to string concatenation: Shlemiel gets a job as a street painter, painting the dotted lines down the middle of the road. On the first day he takes a can of paint out to the road and finishes 300 yards of the road. "That's pretty good!" says his boss, "you're a fast worker!" and pays him a kopeck. The next day Shlemiel only gets 150 yards done. "Well, that's not nearly as go…