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Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

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Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#501

Post by squeaky-clean »

sjnair96 wrote: post #416
squeaky-clean wrote: post #321

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've only been doing it for a few months now, so I'm not an expert, or even particularly proficient, haha. But the difference, as I understand it, is practicing the ability to be mindful in any situation. It's easy for me to feel entirely "in the present moment" when I'm deeply involved in a craft or something. and everything is going nicely. But it doesn't help when I want to start the hobby on a Saturday, but am al…

> it doesn't help when I want to start the hobby on a Saturday, but am also too anxious about a deadline next week for work Wow I can really relate to that. Mind telling me what you do for meditation and/or mindfulness? Do you treat them separately, or do them train them together in one program. Any app, or something in particular I can follow?

I use the app Headspace. I've tried a lot of different things, and Headspace is the one that "clicked" for me. I don't really know how much of this is because of Headspace, and how much is just because the 5th try is a charm. The narrator is really helpful, and addresses concerns of mine ("is it ok to scratch this itch?") in the audio for the sessions. Some people have complained that this is distracting, but I've found it helpful. It also has an "unguided" option too, but if you only use that, it'd be cheaper to use a stopwatch app.

I'd suggest trying several different ones (probably not at the same time) until you find what works best for you. And give it a longer chance than you might be willing to at first.

It took me more than 30 days to get to where I could spend two minutes focusing on my breath and feelings and feel better and more in control. It's been a little over 2 months now, and I'm starting to notice negative or anxious thoughts as they happen or spiral into more and more negative thoughts.

Just yesterday at our company's quarterly meeting I had to speak briefly and one of my points was about an error caused by a client that delayed my team's project. I was getting very nervous, even though I knew 1) It wasn't my or anyone else in the company's fault. 2) This isn't new news, it's already been solved and management has known about it since the start. 3) All the other teams have some equivalent detail they're sharing, nobody is perfect.

Yet I was still panicking. I always get unnecessarily anxious in situations like that. Yesterday was the first time in my life I realized that rationalizing like that doesn't work, I was still expending the same energy and stress as if I were panicking. But now I'm stressing about those excuses, instead of stressing about the speech. So I just did my best to focus on my breath and whomever was currently speaking. It wasn't the same as trying to make my brain shut up, it was still furiously panicking and rationalizing, but I didn't have to listen and the thoughts didn't have to affect me.

Best of luck!

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#502

Post by gobengo »

callesgg wrote: post #496

Thinking about and trying to fix my posture. Sitting in a chair to much causes something called "anterior pelvic tilt", almost everyone in the modern world suffers from it more or less. Writing a diary with the stuff that i have on my mind, it is easy to forget who you where before, and why you changed.

I noticed this in myself but never knew the name for it! Thanks

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#503

Post by StavrosK »

rayalez wrote: post #483
rufugee wrote: post #470

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Meditation while running sounds fascinating. Can you explain the technique? Any good sources of information online?

Pretty much the same as any other meditation - the goal is to stop your mind from racing and to clear your head, stop thinking. As you run, you focus on your breathing, or on your body motions, or on the environment around you - whatever makes you feel "present", experiencing the moment around you instead of being in your head. And you just keep running without thinking for some period of time. Couple more bonuses of…

Does meditation have any benefit for people who don't have an internal monologue? As I understand it, meditation helps you to clear the voice in your head, but what if you don't have one?

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#504

Post by jmagoon »

Kiro wrote: post #279
paloaltokid wrote: post #160

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why not just give it a try on your own? Do it for 21 days and don't let yourself have an opinion on it until that stretch of time is done. Then see how you feel and make a decision.

What is the end goal? What is supposed to happen?

That's the question I asked before just starting and being consistent (which is absolutely key) about it. The answer was that I learned the mind could operate in a radically different way, and that malleability led to greater understanding of the dynamically different ways others can perceive the world.

But that was just my experience of it after a short time (one month)--it's an empirical process of consciously observing your own mind (and letting things go), which is fascinating, and leads to continuous changes in how you interact with the world and others in it.

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#507

Post by geff82 »

For me, it was getting into IT when I was 30 (4 years ago) and for the first time in my life, I loved my work. I did not do it when I was 20, when was deeply into programming. Instead, I feared math in computer science studies, which led me to work as a car salesman (one that read HN all the time). When I was really broke and unhappy, I met a guy who introduced me into IT contracting for big companies. I just did what he said and instantly landed a long term gig that quadrupled my income. This, in return, made me read, read, read to learn as much as possible. Besides work, I now do Computer Science courses at university. Boy, had I known I could do all this, I would have started a decade sooner...

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#508

Post by mtrimpe »

rconti wrote: post #311
dotsamuelswan wrote: post #287

After a single week of using a physical daily planner, I realized I'd accomplished more in the previous week than I had in the past 6 months. No looking back. Every Sunday I write down a single thing to accomplish for each day of the next week: Read a chapter of a book, Write a post about a specific topic, etc. Procrastination is super dangerous when there isn't a deadline. Way too easy for "tomorrow" to turn into ne…

My biggest problem with planners and to-do lists is I don't consult them. I've tried evernote, I've tried google notes, I used a Palm Pilot 20 years ago. I think technology is better for me because it's always available, but simply having a todo list doesn't cause me to remember to check it. I never think "hey, I'm bored, I wonder what's on the list!" Any advice?

Grow a habit of checking some (any) system first. BJ Fogg's Tiby Habits program is a good start. And make sure it's a tiny investment of time/energy at first so no full-blown complex planning right off the bat.

Generally reading 'Making it all work' from the GTD guy also helped with just wanting to get everything into some system; which I developed bit by bit using tiny habit changes.

By now I have an amazingly complex system involving a Google Sheet, Workflowy and Evernote that would be just about ready to be turned into a professional product... but getting there I went through dozens and dozens of little improvements of just getting everything out of my kind and into some system.

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#509

Post by [deleted] »

rconti wrote: post #311
dotsamuelswan wrote: post #287

After a single week of using a physical daily planner, I realized I'd accomplished more in the previous week than I had in the past 6 months. No looking back. Every Sunday I write down a single thing to accomplish for each day of the next week: Read a chapter of a book, Write a post about a specific topic, etc. Procrastination is super dangerous when there isn't a deadline. Way too easy for "tomorrow" to turn into ne…

My biggest problem with planners and to-do lists is I don't consult them. I've tried evernote, I've tried google notes, I used a Palm Pilot 20 years ago. I think technology is better for me because it's always available, but simply having a todo list doesn't cause me to remember to check it. I never think "hey, I'm bored, I wonder what's on the list!" Any advice?

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: What was your “why didn't I start doing this sooner” moment?

#510

Post by Karunamon »

andrepd wrote: post #221
redipiny wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The difference is that you can accomplish meaningful things in reality with those numbers.

I think it's very presumptuous to tell people what is meaningful and not. I have no interest in yachts or sports cars, something stereotypically bought by rich people. OTOH, I have great pride in my current DF save, and in being good at speedrunning some games, for instance. Neither of this things cost me a penny. What makes this less meaningful that something bought with money?

Yes, thank you!

If one's reasoning is reductive enough, literally any activity can be made "meaningless". I find it's best to ignore a third party's evaluation of how you spend your time in most cases; they have their own biases, their own dreams, their own definition for what success and self actualization means.

That is something that you, only you, the consciousness reading these words, can decide.

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