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Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

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Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#51

Post by totally »

PascLeRasc wrote: post #41
geoffchan23 wrote: post #34

I'm going to try and add a different angle to this because most people here have covered what I wanted to say (performance, compensation etc.) I would use this time to find out how your manager is doing in his/her role. Find out how you can help them. Talk to them about their frustrations and how they are feeling. Just because they are your manager doesn't mean you need to treat them like a boss all the time. Show th…

I have pretty bad work-related anxiety and I recently started seeing a therapist who specializes in it. She recommended I start thinking of my role as solely "to make my manager look good". This changed my whole mindset from trying to be a better/more efficient developer to trying to look out for what's on my manager's plate and how my behavior would reflect on her and her team. It's really helped me and I know my ma…

Sure, would love to know what a change your actions would take with this mindset, thanks.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#52

Post by nautilus12 »

geoffchan23 wrote: post #34

I'm going to try and add a different angle to this because most people here have covered what I wanted to say (performance, compensation etc.) I would use this time to find out how your manager is doing in his/her role. Find out how you can help them. Talk to them about their frustrations and how they are feeling. Just because they are your manager doesn't mean you need to treat them like a boss all the time. Show th…

I tried this approach and it didnt work out well for me because my company ended up doing a matrix organization and i had two managers. It turned out that being an ambassador for my current manager's concerns and wanting to make them look good in the larger org didn't work out. They just got upset when they weren't directly a part of the success I was having with the other manager and pushed me away.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#53

Post by marcinzm »

Beltiras wrote: post #39
geoffchan23 wrote: post #34

I'm going to try and add a different angle to this because most people here have covered what I wanted to say (performance, compensation etc.) I would use this time to find out how your manager is doing in his/her role. Find out how you can help them. Talk to them about their frustrations and how they are feeling. Just because they are your manager doesn't mean you need to treat them like a boss all the time. Show th…

This attitude works if you have a leader for a manager. Notsomuch if s/he's a boss.

Sure it does, baring sociopaths they are still human with the usual sense of empathy. And even sociopaths have a sense of self-interest. You can trigger that sense of empathy and there's many books on it (starting with the classic How to Win Friends & Influence People). And most everyone likes someone who makes their life easier rather than harder. Hell, bosses in my experience promote sycophants (not saying you have to go that far) a lot more often than leaders do so it's likely to work even better on them.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#54

Post by frausto »

HoustonRefugee wrote: post #50

I prefer 1:1 when there is something relevant to discuss (merit increases, onboarding, significant problems). Personally I believe this is the best way the manager/employee relationship should function. Email and daily interaction should be more than enough to maintain communication on projects, work, etc. The clear sign of a good manager is the less 1:1's the better. That means the manager is respected enough by his…

How do you feel about monthly 1:1's? This was my approach though the topic was less about keeping up to date with what the team/person has been doing, and more about how they are feeling, if there any roadblocks I could help them with, if they are interested in the work they are doing, etc etc...

I think of my job as a manager as supporting and empowering my team to be productive and making sure they are happy with their work, this was just one way for me to do so.

Given your preference for less 1:1's, I would be interested to hear your take.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#55

Post by xivzgrev »

Reading a lot of comments here people have a very wide range of what they try to cover and I think it’s unnecessary on an every week basis.

Let’s start with the basics. Your manager’s number one job is to unblock your success. Whatever the fuck you need to do your job, the 1:1 is when you discuss it (assuming it can wait until 1:1, sometimes things are more urgent and you just need to grab manager right then).

Be sure to bring proposed solutions not just problems

-bringing a problem: “billy the director from marketing keeps direct messaging me asking for help. I want to help but it’s taking too time” -bringing a solution: same as above, plus “...given the xyz support process, I’m going to send billy an email and cc you, reminding them to follow the process and to reach out to so and so with these issues. If there’s any pushback can you back me up?”

You can also share accomplishments / progress but usually there are other channels for that.

Then as needed the other stuff here makes sense eg build rapport, ask about them, career dev etc

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#56

Post by agilebyte »

geoffchan23 wrote: post #34

I'm going to try and add a different angle to this because most people here have covered what I wanted to say (performance, compensation etc.) I would use this time to find out how your manager is doing in his/her role. Find out how you can help them. Talk to them about their frustrations and how they are feeling. Just because they are your manager doesn't mean you need to treat them like a boss all the time. Show th…

A supervisor is in a position of power over you, it's their job. What's the upside for me for potentially opening up a can of worms where I discuss their performance - that's negative? We are not friends, it's a professional relationship. If they need to talk to someone about their job, they have their boss to talk to.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#57

Post by PascLeRasc »

totally wrote: post #51
PascLeRasc wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have pretty bad work-related anxiety and I recently started seeing a therapist who specializes in it. She recommended I start thinking of my role as solely "to make my manager look good". This changed my whole mindset from trying to be a better/more efficient developer to trying to look out for what's on my manager's plate and how my behavior would reflect on her and her team. It's really helped me and I know my ma…

Sure, would love to know what a change your actions would take with this mindset, thanks.

For example, we're changing some of our server infrastructure. This was supposed to be a huge project and was anticipated to take at least 6 months. I found and modified a script that will do it in ~30 seconds, took me a few hours. Instead of presenting it at our team meeting, I sent it to my manager and let her present it to her managers. Everyone was very impressed with her work writing it. I don't really care about getting credit for it since:

(1) if I want to stay here and get a promotion or raise, it'll be my manager approving that.

(2) if I decide to leave (the much more likely scenario), I don't care about how much credit I got here. My close coworkers know what I do/have accomplished which is all that matters for a reference.

After learning this, I've been trying to go to my manager with potential issues and solutions preemptively. I'll present a few solutions like "would it be helpful to you if you had ___ or ___?" and let her micromanage which one.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#58

Post by cheshireoctopus »

agilebyte wrote: post #56
geoffchan23 wrote: post #34

I'm going to try and add a different angle to this because most people here have covered what I wanted to say (performance, compensation etc.) I would use this time to find out how your manager is doing in his/her role. Find out how you can help them. Talk to them about their frustrations and how they are feeling. Just because they are your manager doesn't mean you need to treat them like a boss all the time. Show th…

A supervisor is in a position of power over you, it's their job. What's the upside for me for potentially opening up a can of worms where I discuss their performance - that's negative? We are not friends, it's a professional relationship. If they need to talk to someone about their job, they have their boss to talk to.

Good question.

I am under the impression my manager is trying to get the next role.

If I am able to understand, and perhaps even address, my manager's concerns, then I can help them manage themselves onto the next level.

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#59

Post by jredwards »

I keep a running list and discuss whatever I've added to it since our last meeting (1:1s are weekly). I do this for my manager and for my reports.

Most of the list will be about whatever the issues of the week are.

In terms of recurring items, the only thing that stands out is that I try to have a career conversation with my reports at least once a quarter.

(I also time-stamp the list so I can see when we had conversations historically, which is occasionally useful)

Re: Ask HN: What agenda do you have for 1:1 meetings with your supervisor?

#60

Post by solotronics »

PascLeRasc wrote: post #57
totally wrote: post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sure, would love to know what a change your actions would take with this mindset, thanks.

For example, we're changing some of our server infrastructure. This was supposed to be a huge project and was anticipated to take at least 6 months. I found and modified a script that will do it in ~30 seconds, took me a few hours. Instead of presenting it at our team meeting, I sent it to my manager and let her present it to her managers. Everyone was very impressed with her work writing it. I don't really care abou…

This is kind of ridiculous that a manager would take credit for something you wrote on your own initiative and present it as hers.
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