491–500 of 905 posts
C programmer is bartending. Someone says "get me a double whiskey, plus a root beer" Drinks arrive, customer asks: "hey why is there ice cream in this?" "I had to make it to a root beer float when you added it to the double"
Someone else got downvoted to oblivion for this, though it deserves to be higher because it’s a classic: “I know a UDP joke, but I’m not sure you’ll get it”.
So the programming joke:
The managers, especilally mid-level, and project owners.
A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane…
How did the programmer die in the shower?
'Lather, rinse, repeat'
There's an old Joel on Software one related to string concatenation: Shlemiel gets a job as a street painter, painting the dotted lines down the middle of the road. On the first day he takes a can of paint out to the road and finishes 300 yards of the road. "That's pretty good!" says his boss, "you're a fast worker!" and pays him a kopeck. The next day Shlemiel only gets 150 yards done. "Well, that's not nearly as go…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Because passing the city by copy is way too expensive and won't destroy the original city anyway.
Depending on the language the ampersand could mean by copy or by reference. I suspect the commentor wants by reference, since they want to examine it later.
Yikes. Which languages use ampersand to signal passing by value? That's a massive footgun if I'm ever cargo-culting my way through writing some code in one of those languages for the first time.
Their vacuum cleaner!
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Thats a rehash of an old joke: I know it soviet style: A mathematician, a physicist and a biologist are flying in a air balloon and are lost. They encounter a man walking below: The biologist asks him: "do you know, where we are?" "..." the man looks up and says nothing The physicist ask him: "can you please tell us, where we are!" "..." after a while the man says: "in a balloon". The mathematician remarks, ah, he mu…
A Soviet engineer needs some plumbing done in his apartment, and calls for a plumber. The plumber arrives, does his thing, and hands over the bill. The engineer is shocked. -'What, this is like a quarter of what I make in a month - for half an hour's work???' Plumber shrugs. -'Well, why don't you come join us? Easy work, well paid, no responsibility - just remember to keep mum about your degree, as we're not supposed…