Ask HN: Depression, Loss of Motivation, Feeling Lost. Please Help

you mentioned receiving the advice "go to a doctor / shrink / and talk stuff out." but did not mention pursuing it. this is good advice and as a college student you have several people you can talk to about this:

- college-health therapist, social worker, or doctor - family doctor - recommended or yellow page'd therapist, social worker, or doctor

These folks will be able to help you assess your troubles, and initiate treatment or refer you to a provider proper treatment.

Good luck, hang in there :)

If you're sure it's not medical related force yourself to go out and talk to someone. Anyone. About anything. I'm a college student too, so if you want to talk, email me at yadavh@umich.edu and we can set some time to just shoot the shit. Yeah you don't know me, but maybe you've still got a little spontaneity in you.

Some thoughts from personal experience:

- Stop thinking.

- Take a blank sheet of paper.

- Write 1 simple task at the top, e.g. do the laundry.

- Do not write any more tasks.

- Put the paper somewhere in your face.

- Complete said task. Force yourself to do so.

- No interruptions, get it done.

- Cross off the task.

Congratulations, you've set a goal and achieved it. Trivial, but it's progress. You are now allowed to turn the brain back on and think. Momentum is good. Breathe deep! I noticed that at extreme low points I damn near stop. Perhaps this is why exercise is recommended so much, to help you move and breathe again.

Mentally I've found two things help:

- Knowing that there is a way forward out of this mess. May require outside help and support to convince you of this.

- Simplifying and focusing on one small thing at a time. There are very few things in life that really must be done right now, some will have to wait and until there is space there's no point stressing about them.

If you have understanding friends or family, TALK.

Pretty much everyone here has talked about stuff that could be wrong with you, and it is possible, but I want to offer an alternative explanation: you aren't being challenged enough. I was in school for two years and experienced a lot of the same stuff you did (I'm 21 now, I dropped out):

1) Was smart enough to glide through classes for my whole life, college not an exception

2) Started off having a lot of fun but got over the drinking and partying phase faster than my classmates, definitely felt lack of connection with my classmates

3) Thought a lot about whether or not I was actually depressed, especially because of the lack of connection w/ classmates. Tried a lot of stuff (diet, exercise, shrink etc.) Nothing quite seemed to do the trick (though the exercise helps a ton with daily stress but will not fix depression).

Although I obviously can't recommend it to everyone, I dropped out and started working. Now I had been freelancing and doing internships since I was about 15 so I had a solid shot at an entry level position at a startup. I can't tell you how much happier it made me.

You may not be able to just drop out, but I bet if you find an internship or something that involves you in the "real world" in a way that's somewhat meaningful to you (ie: not getting coffee) you'll get a lot more satisfaction out of life.

Remember you're young, you're not exactly supposed to have it all figured out yet. Even old people don't have life figured out yet, no one ever does. You also sound pretty introverted, and self reflective. This is a really great trait, but it can be crippling if you don't know how to manage it. You'll learn to know yourself and catch yourself repeating patterns.

It doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with you to me, but again I'm just a dog on the internet. My contact info is in my profile, feel free to email me if you'd like to chat sometime.

Somewhat related to #1 is vitamin D deficiency. Don't fall in the trap of dismissing it because it's "just a vitamin" (which it actually isn't), because a severe deficiency will screw you up good. Pretty much everyone is deficient, but the severity varies. Geeks who spend most of their time indoors, staying late up at night working on stuff are more at risk. Don't assume that drinking a lot of fortified milk/whatever or living in a sunny climate makes you immune, because it doesn't.

At first a deficiency will just make you feel "off", but if left untreated it will make you feel as if you're slowly dying (not exaggerating) with muscle/bone/joint pain, fever, blurry vision, insomnia and brain fog. Depression and anxiety are secondary symptoms (how can you not become depressed with all this?), but still just symptoms, not a cause (in this case).

It's a simple test that could save you (anyone) a lot of grief, because you really do not want to let it go that far, and recovery takes a looooong time (months). You may have to insist (and do insist) on getting it checked, because most doctors won't by default. Most doctors also don't know how to interpret test results properly. Also worth considering is taking a B-complex vitamin. But first and foremost, talk to a doctor about it.