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Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

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Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#351
I'm younger than you, and the many others who joined the chorus here.

I'm curious if you feel that you had a plan, earlier in life. In other words did you expect to find a clearer purpose after finishing your degree? Or did you have an idea for the longer term that ended up not working?

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#352

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because it seems that the "survival" part could - and should - be automated away in this day and age. Just like we try and do with all the other boring stuff we don't want to do over and over and over again.

Automation is an effort multiplier, but it's not a cure-all, and it's not free. Building and maintaining the system will ultimately take some sort of time, work, or money input from people. So, if someone isn't going to somehow contribute to the input, why should they benefit from the output? And if they are contributing somehow, then isn't that a job?

Give me that job, and I'll happily shut up!

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#353
Find something that is more suited to you, whether it is another job, or some entrepreneurial endeavor. For the longest time, I bought into climbing the corporate ladder. It was making me unhappy and very unhealthy, mentally and physically. Then I came to the realization that I don't want to be a manager or an executive or even a tech lead. I just want to be a peon coder. That is the sum total of my career ambitions. Once I realized this, I changed jobs to a company that doesn't try to push or promote me into tech lead/management; I am and remain a mere programmer by choice. And I have never been happier at a job.

Not saying your ambition should be to be a peon, like it turns out mine is, but you need to figure out what it is and do something that'll get you there.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#354

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Slaves don't get to pick where they sleep, either. Thing is, neither do most people. SELECT TOP 1 job,residence FROM jobs JOIN residences WHERE jobs.pay > residences.rent ORDER BY jobs.pay DESC, residences.rent ASC it's common to add some qualifications like... AND jobs.category NOT IN ('murder','prostitution') AND residences.crime_factor ...etc. But that doesn't change the fact that LOTS of people believe in their h…

In those terms, we are enslaved by the existence of personal property. Or maybe by the existence of society, in general. Society's requirements force you into a certain set of paths. > Why exactly is it so hard to survive without a job, in 2016? Why should it not be, for a sufficiently broad definition of "job"?

I like how you're thinking.

    > [Suppose] we are enslaved by the
    > existence of personal property ...
Okay. All personal property, or would could this be narrowed down to real estate?

    > [Maybe we are enslaved] by the
    > existence of society, in general.
I hope not. I hope to isolate the problem down to something more specific, and file a bug report.

This topic is a hobby of mine.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#355

Earlier quoted context omitted.

18F is not tied to the white house, so there should be no changes when the next administration arrives, no matter who it is.

18F are still contractors, right? So you are kidding? :) > "...there should be no changes when > the next administration arrives..." I understand that you are referring to some specific small category of changes. You're saying that no new president can administratively close 18f. Got it. But, for the English word 'changes', there will be some. If you had to place a bet regarding the future size of the USDS, what fact…

No, we are federal employees.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#356

I am 39. I feel this way every few years. I look back on the previous few years and realize that the ideas/goals that I had, I did not accomplish. I then start to look for new ways to accomplish them. I still have a 8-5 that I need to pay my bills. So I start with the 1 hour a day idea. Goto work, come home, eat dinner with the family. Then I get 1 hour to do whatever I want. No interruptions. Then, well, it is Frida…

Thanks for sharing, it's nice that you found your peace and balance in life. Your “1 hour per day” approach is a great one and it looks like it has been proven to be successful by many people, because it's not the first time I read about something like this.

However, even if I personally have a big plan and that 1 hour per day, sometimes I just don't feel like doing anything at all but just purposelessly walking/biking or drinking alcohol. I guess that's the problem the author highlighted. It's not about accomplishing something, but not knowing what you actually want to accomplish in the first place, what to do next. When you know what to do, it's actually not that hard to find time for it, because you have a clear understanding and motivation, otherwise you're just getting caught in an everyday routine spending year after year burning out that limited time you have of your mediocre life.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#357
I think feeling lost is a key motivator in life to do things. Do anything. Sure, it's ok to ask for advice, and it's ok to feel down and overwhelmed... Just don't let it control you. Go out and help someone in need. It will give you purpose, but more importantly it will give you perspective on your own life. You'll find that there are people out there who haven't had the same opportunities as you and you will have something to give them. Some knowledge, some advice of your own, or even just someone to listen to. Do one small thing every day. Read a book. Give something away. If you keep doing these things something will click and fall into place, and you will be on your way to filling that void. But actually it's not a void. It's natural for people to feel alone or lost. Keep your chin up my friend. The sun is about to rise and will soon shine warmly on your face. RU

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#358
I have felt this way too, believe me... "Felt" because I got tired of the feeling and sent in my resignation. I couldn't keep complaining and feeling without doing anything about it while time raced. I'm 29 too and we can both share how we look back and see how quickly everything seemed to happen, our mates are almost all married!! Or are you married too..? Lol.

Well.. About 7 months later I'm coming across your post in my hacker newsletter email and I have this to offer you (for your journey will be different from mine) :

Books: The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, and the Millionaire Fastlane by MJ Demarco.

Learn as much from your job while you read these and then follow your heart when you decide to follow the signs.

Your yearning is the beginning. And whenever you're depressed remember Isaiah 40:31 (even though I don't use it.. Lol). The promises really happen.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#359

You have two basic tasks: maintenance and improvement. (1) pay debt. Pay rent. eat. exercise. this is self-care stuff. It's foundational to well-being. Fail at it, and you're going to be getting into serious problems. (2) While you're managing self-care, focus on the vector you're going. Where do you want it to go? Not where do your parents want, your elders want, your friends what. What do you, the individual want?…

I also am a Christian and was surprised not to see more of these responses on HN.

I think if you're looking for the meaning of life, religions are easily worth the research.

I think the reality is that religion is looked down upon because it's "old" and existed before modern scientific methods existed. Nevertheless, it still provides some of the most consistent answers to the meaning of life that we have available, and they've been trusted, followed, and researched for far longer than any of the other ideas.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#360

Happiness can only be found within the Self. Not anywhere outside. Meditate an hour a day and more your inner condition as you go. Heartfulness.org

There is one real choice here. Agree with the meditation, it will make beings realize the truth (most people are afraid to know the truth within them). We human beings are all (without exception) trapped (I prefer this term instead of enslaved) in the cycle of `Samsara` (loop), but there is a way to break free from this machine, and `Meditation` is the key.
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