31–40 of 102 posts
As someone who suffers from mental health disorders, I found it immensely helpful.
> when I suddenly started feeling anxious and depressed for no discernible reason This sounds chemical! Medication helped me, try it!
Dear OP, your second user account (an_tye_h3ro) is getting auto-killed, which you won't notice while logged in, so only people with showdead enabled can see comments from that account. I've sent an email to HN about it but they're probably fast asleep right now. Maybe see if you can post on the original throwaway again? Additionally, there's a dead comment from streetwiseherc you might want to read which will show up…
This sounds exactly like my situation to a T. I'll be straightforward: I'd love to chat -- anonymously of course -- in the hope that we both might benefit. I cooked up a GMail account just for that reason, which you can find in my profile. I'll monitor it for the next day or so if you'd accept the offer.
Call this number right now. Right now. 1 (800) 273-8255
I will not be calling any strange number until I've found a way to make truly anonymous phone calls (e.g. something in the realm of RedPhone + onion routing like Tor).
But it's limited to US IPs. Using Tor browser, you can specify US exits. See https://tor.stackexchange.com/questions/4732/google-play-sto... You put the configuration options in ./Data/Tor/torrc-defaults. See https://tor.stackexchange.com/questions/1065/what-happened-t...
Dear OP, your second user account (an_tye_h3ro) is getting auto-killed, which you won't notice while logged in, so only people with showdead enabled can see comments from that account. I've sent an email to HN about it but they're probably fast asleep right now. Maybe see if you can post on the original throwaway again? Additionally, there's a dead comment from streetwiseherc you might want to read which will show up…
Just to clarify so OP doesn't think their being targeted on purpose: new accounts over Tor are prone to automatic bans.
Read some of the great books that exist in the world. They contain amazing thoughts that might change your entire mindset.
The following might apply to you or not - you have to decide yourself: You might have connected your self-confidence to your goals or dreams or success and are possibly also comparing yourself to others (jealousy). You need to let go of all that, since love for life is at the very bottom of everything, and does not come by struggling for it. There are countless reasons to live, as you have surely experienced before - you just can't see them right now. This will change eventually, and it's worth to stick around to get to see it. So that's one thing. The other thing is the situation you find yourself in, which you still might want to improve. To do that without becoming depressed, try to reserve a fixed amount of time to work toward any goals, without becoming attached to them. Just put in the effort every day for a fixed amount of time. If the things you want to change can't be changed by working towards them, you need to let them go, too.
Does this ring a bell? If not, each depression is different - and I hope some of the other comments help you.
The only reason I do keep living is that I find I can't answer the opposite question either:
Why not keep living?
At least for that variant many reasons do surface, and whilst none seem overwhelmingly strong they do allow the question to evolve into:
Why not keep living a little while longer?
A deferred decision as I've found no strong answers either way.
I suspect that living a long life is to just not have strong answers either way and to discover that time has passed and now you're old.
I don't buy the argument that suicide isn't an option, of course it is. When despair is all you have, and the future is bleak, it sometimes can appear to be the only option. Somehow though, a short time later, decision not made, I've always found myself in some place in which I'm glad I didn't. In which I've found some peace, some bliss, some joy from life... and doing so has driven the despair away.
I have no answer for "Why keep living?", but if you are willing to consider changing things in your life (to get away from the things that bring you despair) then you can find some answers of varying merit to the opposite question.