31–40 of 61 posts
1. Write down or internally note every time you think you "should" do, be, or etc. something. (i.e. "I should do the dishes" or "I should be more disciplined")
2. Evaluate the underlying assumptions behind each "should" you've told yourself and if it helps you in any way. (i.e. "I have decided I wouldn't keep dishes in the sink more than 1 day" or "My childhood raised me with too-high rigor standards")
Q1) What makes you happy? (easier said than done, but if not as work, finding things that you can do outside of work, and like-minded people you can meet makes life worthwhile I feel. I am still working on this myself)
Q2) What makes you want to feel like you can't wait to get up every day in the morning? (Sometimes it's just a mindset switch, from this is a "job" to actually finding ways to become very engaged, and passionate. Finding ways to tie it into your long-term goals whether pursuit of knowledge or curiosity, for example)
Q3)What are your financial goals? (Whether you're FI, or not has a huge effect for the questions above I feel, and sometimes that will help you sort your short, medium and long-term expectations)
For me, work satisfaction comes down to: am I solving important problems? Am I growing / maturing through the work I am doing (ie is it challenging me in the right way)? Do I like and respect the people I work with? Am I valued and rewarded for what I do?
For me these are the things that matter and I've been lucky on these dimensions across my career.
So maybe first question to yourself is - what are the dimensions you care about? They may have overlap with mine or not.
Second question, of the dimensions you care about, which ones are you not satisfied with in your current role.
Third question, what are steps you can do to improve those dimensions?
I think such framework can be helpful. I'll come back and reply more later if this strikes a chord.
In my case it's largely, but not entirely, me. No matter where I go or what I do, the biggest problem will still be there.
Whatever the answer is in your situation will narrow things down.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
I am sure you have built things with your bare hands that you have been proud of or maybe someone close to you. if i compare theses events in my own life to the things i built as a dev i must say: something is off. and nobody is helped if we sugarcoat things like that. sw engineering is hard work and more often than not feels like a waste of time. i never aspired to stand out, all i want is build something i can be p…
I certainly didn't intend to sugarcoat anything. I was actually hoping to lay bare the harsh reality that work is often disappointing. I would hazard a guess that maligree has built at least a few things they're proud of at work. I read their post as expressing an overall feeling that they're not at home in their job, which to my understanding is a tangent from whether or not you have individual accomplishments to be…
However, I know that I am my worst enemy in this. I am paid well and above those I graduated with. There are different pain points with iOS development, but overall I like it. Except for the similar feeling, my current issues is being okay about still needing to learn a lot (being 37 I want to have a much higher mastery than currently), and also my current team which doesn't high standards.
Enjoying work for me is about two things; being good at what I do (and efficient!) and also being in a good team. Any job can be fun when you are working with the right people – but of course that doesn't always extend to every kind of job.
You started out the way I started out with learning IT. I did it because I wanted to play games. It became a profession (administration), but later on I wanted better jobs, higher pay etc. and decided on university. From my current situation I work from home, can work basically anywhere, and I enjoy a kind of freedom which is quite rare. I also have ambitions to become a consultant in the long run, make a few apps of my own etc.
I love what I do when I am good at it. No matter what I do the same issue will occur; drudging past being mediocre is painful and I hate it. Being 37 and wished I was only 25 instead (skill-wise after university) doesn't really help either – that is something I have to consciously be aware because I've had health issues.
Maybe I have become a bit jaded, but I don't expect work to be fun. I expect work to be meaningful mentally, engaging, and give me the lifestyle and freedom I want. What do you want from work, really?
It also has helped tremendously to put significant effort into learning how to communicate effectively (reading books, attending workshops, etc.), focusing significant energy into learning project management and people skills even if I don't want to be a manager, and to only take jobs with folks who I feel really respected and valued by. I also realize that I simply can't work a 40 hour week so now I work a 30 hour week even though it means that I am compensated less. I can use those two extra hours per day to exercise, practice music, meditate, take my time eating breakfast and reading, etc.
To turn this into questions that you can ask yourself:
1. What do you hate most about your job?
2. Are you able to articulate these difficulties and challenges to your supervisor and team and really be heard? If not, what can you do to improve your ability to state your needs?
3. Are you willing to leave a job that doesn't satisfy you and are you confident in your abilities to identify a job that you would like better?
4. Are you willing to sacrifice money for improved happiness?
5. Is there something else that you would rather be doing? How can you integrate that into your life to make your life feel balanced?
A sabbatical is not a vacation: your day job is trying to find what makes you tick. Brainstorm ideas, make plans, then revisit them, have days tightly scheduled and days with nothing, learn new skills, keep an eye open to opportunities, eat with friends or connect with former colleagues, read books, cook new food... But each day spend at least 4 hours on doing things deliberately. I count cooking or meeting with a friend as deliberate if you get out of your comfort zone. Even resting can be deliberate if you stir away from your usual distractions. You will experience time differently when work is not around the corner, waiting for you to come back.
You may or may not find a satisfying purpose to your life but you will grow and understand yourself better. Maybe you'll find that money is not what makes you happy and you'd prefer to sacrifice compensation for a job more in line with you. Maybe you'll yearn for a high pace job that keeps you on your feet. Who knows? But it will be your answer.
https://www.deepthoughtapp.com/
https://www.notion.so/aizatto/Intro-to-Deep-Thought-Using-De...