Curious what people thing is the reason this post is being downvoted (while also having decent responses in the comments.)
On the surface, that would seem to indicate it is a polarizing topic.
Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
31–40 of 68 posts
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#32Earlier quoted context omitted.
Agreed. Look elsewhere, for people with shared interests. Don't tie your social circle to work. It makes it harder to leave the job and allows the company to take greater advantage of you.
That is a pretty cynical take. I work 40 hours a week. Doing it at home is lonely.
You can work from a co-working space or cafe if you need to be around other people.
I actually think it's quite the opposite of cynical to engage with your community in a much more natural way than it is to be forced to socialize within the context of a for-pay job.
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#33I would recommend looking into decoupling your social needs from your job. Even in the time before wide spread WFH this was an issue, during good times it feels great to go into work and get all your social needs met but when layoffs come or companies collapse suddenly that great work friend everyone loves gets let go and in a few more weeks they effectively don't exist anymore. It's great if you can meet people at w…
Tone deaf. There's still ~6 hours a day of just sitting in a room alone. Glad you've found success in life but this might not be for others
I'd much prefer to work alone and in silence than in an open office, or cube, or commute...
I can focus on what I'm doing when I'm alone. It's definitely preferable when writing things like code or copy, which is majorly stressful if other people are in the room.
If I feel like chatting, I can go to the cafe, talk to a neighbor. Even meeting the same UPS guy every day is kind of nice and makes me feel like my home is part of a regular community.
It feels much more natural than spending a good portion of my day on the freeway or in an office and just using my home for a place to sleep.
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#34Earlier quoted context omitted.
>Find a local club for a hobby you enjoy. Take an art class at a local community college. Based on the specific words (e.g. "pair programming") the op used in his question, I think he's looking for the work itself to be more social during work hours. Therefore, suggesting an art class or joining a club outside of work is answering a different question.
I think this is an example of the X-Y problem :) OP wants more socialization - I think it's good to think outside the box a bit, especially for us programmers who tend to let programming and work absorb their lives.
>I think this is an example of the X-Y problem [...] , especially for us programmers who tend to let programming and work absorb their lives.
Everybody is different but I as a coincidence, I personally tried your suggestion to pursue outside hobbies and finally learned that it's really the work that makes me happy. I made a previous comment about that life lesson: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=23925964
Some of the replies agree with me. I do understand your viewpoint and acknowledge I'm in the minority group that wants deep work to "absorb my life". I thought I could be a mercenary and just compartmentalize "work" as 9-to-5 and then do "fun stuff" outside of the job but that doesn't make me happy.
Maybe the op doesn't want to work more than 40 hours but if he's asking in 3 different ways to work more around people, it makes perfect sense to me that he wants the work itself to be more social. A few hours a week at an art class still doesn't fix the 40 hours of lonely working.
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#35[deleted]
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#36Have you considered just looking for a job that still requires in-person attendance. Not sure what it's like where you are, but here in the UK there seem to be plenty of those.
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#37I would recommend looking into decoupling your social needs from your job. Even in the time before wide spread WFH this was an issue, during good times it feels great to go into work and get all your social needs met but when layoffs come or companies collapse suddenly that great work friend everyone loves gets let go and in a few more weeks they effectively don't exist anymore. It's great if you can meet people at w…
Tone deaf. There's still ~6 hours a day of just sitting in a room alone. Glad you've found success in life but this might not be for others
I have this too.
Listening to music when the programming task is simple helps me somewhat. Apparently, it scratches part of the "social itch".
YMMV
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#38I'll also say don't expect to socialize at work. It should be a given now but you should never ever ask a co worker out.
It's too risky for everyone involved. Conduct which is okay at a bar or a party has no place in an office.
That said I have made great friends at work. This should be a bonus. If you want to make friends and date do that at a bar , alumni events , concerts, etc.
If you step to a girl and ask if you can buy her a beer at a pub, the worst that happens is she'll say no. If you do it at work, you might come off as rude , seriously don't date co workers. It's easy for HR to get rid of you.
For my part I've had a gay co worker aggressively hit on me. At a bar I'd laugh this off ( or even let him buy me a drink ). At work I felt very uncomfortable. No I don't want to know I look like your husband, why is that an appropriate thing to say in the office!
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#39Consulting A lot of consulting is technical planning and brainstorming with leadership. I used to have that kind of role, and you had a mix of heads-down work prototyping and heads-up work trying to understand requirements and think with different leaders on the best path forward. Related: Staff or Principle Eng Similar role to consulting above, but you're in house and often part of leadership...
What kind of companies offer this and what kind of positions am I looking for?
Re: Ask HN: How can I get a tech job that's more social?
#40I would recommend looking into decoupling your social needs from your job. Even in the time before wide spread WFH this was an issue, during good times it feels great to go into work and get all your social needs met but when layoffs come or companies collapse suddenly that great work friend everyone loves gets let go and in a few more weeks they effectively don't exist anymore. It's great if you can meet people at w…
I don’t think humans evolved to be alone/work alone 8 hours a day 5 days a week. We’ve almost always worked in some sort of a community/tribe each day