Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

31–40 of 54 posts

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#31

Post by eitland »

marcuscreo wrote: post #22

Learn not to answer in the moment, and commit to always give yourself time to think alone about the request and respond in 24 hours. When you do that, you remove the immediate pressure to please the person with a YES answer. You also give the (honest) impression that your answer has thought and weight behind it, and is the measured response of a professional.

While 24 hours sounds much to me I agree on the principle.

Tom Limoncelli/Christine Hogan has you covered on this one I guess: The Practice of System and Network Administration mention that you should ask politely if the other party can fire a mail to the ticket system since "that way you can be sure I won't forget".

Tada: off your mind in to a queue that can be sorted and prioritized.

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#32

Post by corysama »

William Ury, of "Getting to Yes" fame, also has a book titled "The Power of a Positive No" that directly addresses your question. It should be required reading for all software developers. http://www.williamury.com/books/the-power-of-a-positive-no/

Really, if everyone on Earth read those two books and his "Getting Past No", the world would be a much happier place.

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#33

Post by eitland »

I picket it up while volunteering. It came to a point were I couldn't possibly get everything done and at some point I could tell myself with confidence that it wasn't lazyness but rather doing the right thing.

No is still not natural to me but I now master it when necessary I think.

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#34

Post by osmanscam »

Answer of this question may vary depending on your goal.

Ask this question, in the way you describe here, to the person you are reporting to, who is responsible reviewing your annual performance. Depending on your target, you may say yes to all and ok be late for deadlines and no to everything else and just focus on one task, and deliver before the deadline.

However, answering colleague's 5-15 minute long questions is different then the above. You should do it even in the expense of doing overtime. If it takes longer then that, you should return to your work.

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#37

Post by Pengwin »

chadcmulligan wrote: post #25

I seldom say no, I say "Yeh I can do that it might take so and so, I'm doing this at the moment, do you want me to put that on hold?" - if they're for the same person. If they're for different people then - "Yah I can do that, I'm doing this for fred at the moment, so have a talk to him if you like" (or to who ever else pays the bills). Seems to work. If it's a client, "I'll add it to the list and talk to (whoever's…

This is my approach with things too. Instead of saying know I explain the complexities of what would happen by saying yes:

- Other projects will be pushed out of the way

- Your deadline is not feasible, I can do it by this date.

- The cost/time of me doing something would be high, due to my inexperience in doing that task.

- I personally think it is a bad idea and a waste of everyone's time, but it's your call.

Things may work differently for others, but turning a "no" to a "yes, on my terms" is what has worked well in any situation I've been in.

Re: Ask HN: Developers – How did you learn to say NO?

#38

Post by hubert123 »

Why would you ever say things that are untrue? You are simply a lier then. Saying "yes" even though you DONT actually know if you can make it is a lie. You are lying to your manager. Tell him that it's probably gonna be close, and other work might suffer or even that work in particular. I mean why on earth WOULDNT you tell him that? It's not like this won't come up immediately anyway when you inevitably don't finish or don't finish properly.
Post reply on HN