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Ask HN: Are you depressed?

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Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#231

Post by seotut2 »

nl wrote: post #227
seotut2 wrote: post #157

What's the point of this? Yes, I am severely depressed among other issues I am facing. I haven't had a job in 3 years, after burning out and started having panic attacks. The finances are so stressful that are making me just numb. I can't make any decision, the executive part of my brain appears to have shut off. Also, depression is not an illness. It's a defensive mechanism, just a symptom of a certain body state. I…

Depression is an illness (well technically I think it’s called a disorder).

I guess this is a case of arguing by definition. Depression is an illness in as much sleepiness is an illness.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#232

Post by jes5199 »

ograrian wrote: post #145

no, but optimism is dwindling by the day. quit my job in 2018 as I was totally burnt out. figured id take a couple months off and get back to it. spent all of 2019 job hunting with no success. took my last interview in January 2020 which was also a dead end. beaten up and making zero money for all that time takes quite a toll. wife and i had our first child in march. have been a babysitter since then more or less. ha…

taking care of a small child is exhausting. the way our culture says a person can do that full time and also work full time is completely unrealistic. But the shape of it changes over time - you’re what, nine months in? that’s still the hard time. Over the next few months, it will get easier, little by little. The kind of attention that a child needs changes, and while it continues to be intense, I find having a 2-year-old so much less mentally draining than having a small baby was.

If you can, just try to be present in the moment. Maybe you can’t work right now, but what you’re doing is important. Being a good parent will do more good for the world than almost anything you will ever do for money

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#233

Post by jes5199 »

batt4good wrote: post #98

Probably. Doing mushrooms has helped loads - granted aside from slacking off at my job there isn't really much else to do during quarantine ;)

be careful with that. if psychedelics are what is keeping your mood up for a period of months, your connection to consensus reality can get pretty weird

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#234

Post by whofw »

I've definitely had a few rough points since I started my current job early last year. I think I focused too much on my career that it left me with little energy for anything else.

I was finally starting to figure things out and get where I wanted to be in life at the beginning of the year but then the world got flipped upside down and it's been a rollercoaster since.

I almost want to say I was happy working from home, having more time for myself and my hobbies, but I was still looking forward to going back to the office because it brought back a (small) sense of normalcy and it definitely did.

Problem now is that I'm possibly days away from putting in my 2 weeks for a new SWE job in a sector that I'm super interested in and working with much cooler tech, but I'm scared. I'm extremely comfortable in my current role and it's very stable for the time being. I have no idea what the new role will be like - stress, long hours, etc. I know it'll be WFH for at least a few months to start, which I'm not looking forward to. I'm scared to leave my comfort zone in the middle of all this, and I'm worried it'll be terrible for my mental health going into the winter.

I know this isn't exactly the thread for this.. but I don't know where else to talk about it.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#237

Post by _olsk »

Funny enough, I used to be depressed for almost my whole life and now I'm not. Two and a half years ago, I dropped out from an average university to be admitted in Harvard within one year. At that time I also had poor English, struggling to differentiate present and past simple tenses.

In just two years, I ruined relationships with my relatives, lost all friends, don't talk to anyone, got a horribly loose skin, had a mini-stroke and got tinnitus. Also, I became fluent in written English, lost more than 50 kilograms, and right now 70% done preparing for applying for SWE positions. It's tough, but I've never been happier. Never had so much progress before.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#238

Post by hutzlibu »

swat535 wrote: post #186

Nowhere else to post this so here it goes. I lost my job in January. From January - March I started looking for a job and then COVID hits at the height of my search, now suddenly no one is hiring and all the businesses are slowing down. My girlfriend of 13 years left me the day after my birthday in June before I had a chance to propose to her, I had to return the ring, she had no idea and I never told her about it. I…

"My girlfriend of 13 years left me the day after my birthday in June before I had a chance to propose to her"

Well, there is a bright side to it. If you would have married and it was about to break soon after, you would have the joy of a legal divorce now on top of it.

Instead you are free to find someone new. Possibly better fitting. The world is full of women and other awesome people, you can still connect with. A bit harder now, true, but nevertheless possible, once you manage to get out of that hole. So if you don't manage on your own, maybe stop wasting your time mindless browsing and seek professional help or find people, online or offline, to help you throuhg.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#239

Post by baoha »

walty8 wrote: post #216
swat535 wrote: post #186

Nowhere else to post this so here it goes. I lost my job in January. From January - March I started looking for a job and then COVID hits at the height of my search, now suddenly no one is hiring and all the businesses are slowing down. My girlfriend of 13 years left me the day after my birthday in June before I had a chance to propose to her, I had to return the ring, she had no idea and I never told her about it. I…

Just some experiences of mine, I had been really stressful when trying to get a job, long time ago. And eventually I started the jogging at the time. To me, it's like sort of hedge, if I got my job later, I got a heathier body due to more work out. In other words, the destiny is not going to screw me up on both sides :) Actually, I kept on jogging even after I got the job later, I don't know why but that does make yo…

This! Your body will benefit from happy hormones produced after workout. I was in similar position and running 3-4 times a week helped a lot.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#240

Post by mrmuagi »

op03 wrote: post #82
watermelon59 wrote: post #61

Well, let's see. My wife left me shortly before the pandemic started. I tried leaning on alleged friends for emotional support and they bailed on me. I don't have any family here in the US. The pandemic hit and I had to stop practicing my sport. My work output has been 10-20% of what it used to be even though I don't have kids to deal with, or any of the things that are driving folks crazy. It takes me around 2h to m…

Get a dog or three.

I'm sure your suggestion is coming from a good place, but dogs can be quite a burden sometimes, and taking care of them properly is a responsibility. I am taking care of a dog right now that has real barking issues and it's quite annoying but I can't blame the dog.
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