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Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

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Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#231

Post by andai »

bracobama wrote: post #147
atroyn wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well the very first one was literally just 'make your bed as soon as you get up'. I read that idea somewhere else as a way to get a small win right away which I really needed because my startup wasn't doing so great - so I tried it and it worked. This had surprisingly large benefits. I didn't get up and start scrolling through my social media right away. I had a nice neat bed to get into at the end of the day. I coul…

Thanks for this! I use a similar system for meditation and yoga, I find that combining it with an app that keeps a tally of how many days in a row you've done it is really rewarding. It makes me do these things even when I don't feel like it cause I don't want to break the streak I have going.

Yes! I second this.

I started using Insight Timer and am now meditating every single day for the first time.

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#232

Post by andai »

tomjen3 wrote: post #160
atroyn wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well the very first one was literally just 'make your bed as soon as you get up'. I read that idea somewhere else as a way to get a small win right away which I really needed because my startup wasn't doing so great - so I tried it and it worked. This had surprisingly large benefits. I didn't get up and start scrolling through my social media right away. I had a nice neat bed to get into at the end of the day. I coul…

Can you elaborate on how you internalized that it didn't matter whether you wanted to do something or not? That's something I could really use.

I would like to expand on atroyn's reply: Every choice you ever make is self-reinforcing.

If you choose to do the "right" thing or the "wrong" thing in any given moment, that will reinforce your tendency to either persevere or to give up, in the future.

So while some moments of decision may seem more important than others (with obvious / immediate consequences), these moments are in fact all supremely important.

Over time these decisions solidify into habits and character traits. Ultimately, they will determine your fate in life.

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#233

Post by jolux »

thecupisblue wrote: post #220
jolux wrote: post #184

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Being an old school nerd, only the toughest survived with a love of technology back then. Ah yes, only the toughest survive. Tech nerds are so tough that they get offended when somebody doesn't like their shirt. >What frustrates me today is how the media (collectively) have revised the history books and promote some fairly extreme bullying (see the verge's article on Matt Taylor as an example of some extreme and unj…

>Ah yes, only the toughest survive. Tech nerds are so tough that they get offended when somebody doesn't like their shirt. No, you would know it was due to real, physical bullying back then. Not "someone said something I don't like on the internet", but injuring someone and/or degrading them publically due to them loving technology. Oh, while we're at public degradation. >They were complaining that he was wearing a s…

>No, you would know it was due to real, physical bullying back then. Not "someone said something I don't like on the internet", but injuring someone and/or degrading them publically due to them loving technology.

When exactly is "back then" though? I went through school about ten years ago and was beaten up for nerdiness all the time, why people think they can leverage this into a lifetime of misogyny is beyond me. Everyone takes shit in grade school, kids are mean.

>He was wearing a shirt his female friend made for him.

That doesn't make it not sexist.

>She wasn't harassed for making it, he was - because he is a white male in a science field

No, she wasn't harassed because she wasn't wearing it.

>the social justice warriors of the internet decided he is a target for abuse and public degradation, that a shirt is a reason women aren't getting into science. They decided he is a "misogynist" and a "sexist pigdog". That's abuse. That's bullying.

It's too bad a man was called a misogynist on the internet, it must have really hurt his feelings. I thought people like you think SJWs need to grow a thicker skin? Resilience is a two-way street, pal. If you expect us to be tolerant of your abuse, you'd better be tolerant of ours.

>And let me guess, that would be a straight white male.

Good boy! Here's your cookie.

>You're doing a good job of reminding people of their abnormality and victimizing them.

There's a certain kind of conservative who seems to think that any discrepancies in equality in modern western culture are due to individual failings of will because we made sexism and racism illegal like, last century, dude. I don't need to remind people of their abnormality, it's impossible for them to ignore.

I know because I'm neither straight nor a male. (though I am most certainly white) Far before anybody could tell me I was oppressed, I experienced oppression. In particular people in grade school beat me up for expressing femininity, because it is considered unacceptable for men to act feminine in our culture. Telling me I'm not a victim while I'm lying in a puddle of my own schoolwork mixed with other peoples' spit getting the shit kicked out of me doesn't make you clever or objective, it makes you a sadistic asshole.

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#234

Post by jezclaremurugan »

fspear wrote: post #183
jezclaremurugan wrote: post #34

Learned optimism - or at least this blog post - https://github.com/raganwald/presentations/blob/master/optim... Changed my whole outlook.

I keep finding that no matter how much I want to be an optimist I cannot. The problem I have with it is that it feels as if I'm deluding myself whenever I try to be optimistic about anything and I can't hold it for any significant amount of time, perhaps I get too carried away when I become "optimistic". Maybe it's just me but would you have any tips to overcome or at least come to terms with this mentality?

I read a quote somewhere "remember in the dark, what you saw in the light" - what I do is list the reasons why I believe in a plan or something, and when the doubts come, I validate it against the list of reasons. If the doubts actually invalidate the reason, it is a valid case for concern, but more often than not, its just me forgetting the reasons I first believed in something. This works when I start a project too - a list of reasons why I need to complete that..

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#235

Post by [deleted] »

jolux wrote: post #233
thecupisblue wrote: post #220

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Ah yes, only the toughest survive. Tech nerds are so tough that they get offended when somebody doesn't like their shirt. No, you would know it was due to real, physical bullying back then. Not "someone said something I don't like on the internet", but injuring someone and/or degrading them publically due to them loving technology. Oh, while we're at public degradation. >They were complaining that he was wearing a s…

>No, you would know it was due to real, physical bullying back then. Not "someone said something I don't like on the internet", but injuring someone and/or degrading them publically due to them loving technology. When exactly is "back then" though? I went through school about ten years ago and was beaten up for nerdiness all the time, why people think they can leverage this into a lifetime of misogyny is beyond me. E…

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#238

Post by pm »

jat850 wrote: post #117
vr46 wrote: post #100

My parents worked their nuts off to pay for my education and provide security for the family - my dear old late dad woke up at 4am EVERY SINGLE DAY of the year, except Christmas Day, to work for me, basically. There's no way I'm giving up on anything. I have a ridiculously easy life compared to them, and because of them. That's my main motivation, apart from my own young family. And I surround myself mostly with tale…

Not your fault, but your comment made me subtly sad that I haven't repaid the same sacrifice and commitment from my family with as much as they deserved. They too worked very hard to provide and give a good life for me, and through naivety, youth, inexperience, laziness - I pissed a large portion of it away. I try to do better now, but I think I'll always carry some personal guilt over that. I can't fix the past, but…

I relate, and I think I did okay with what I was given, but I think I could've done better. However, the thing that's helped me the most is to learn from the mistake once, and then leave it all behind. It has always been easier said than done of course, but it's gotten easier over time; I hope you allow yourself the latitude to do the same.

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#239

Post by pm »

kerbalspacepro wrote: post #174
arkades wrote: post #156

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I keep a small list of Marcus Aurelius quotes pinned up by my monitor. A few that work for me: "Marcus Aurelius: Be a boxer, not a gladiator, in the way you act on your principles. The gladiator takes up his sword only to put it down again, but the boxer is never without his fist and has only to clench it." "Remember how long you have procrastinated, and how consistently you have failed to put to good use your suspen…

That last one is literally the one thing that gets me out of bad some days: "Was I made for lying warm in bed under a pile of blankets?"

On many days I think yes, and I have no problems admitting this (especially during winter).

Re: Ask HN: What inspires you to persevere through adversity?

#240

Post by jat850 »

pm wrote: post #238
jat850 wrote: post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not your fault, but your comment made me subtly sad that I haven't repaid the same sacrifice and commitment from my family with as much as they deserved. They too worked very hard to provide and give a good life for me, and through naivety, youth, inexperience, laziness - I pissed a large portion of it away. I try to do better now, but I think I'll always carry some personal guilt over that. I can't fix the past, but…

I relate, and I think I did okay with what I was given, but I think I could've done better. However, the thing that's helped me the most is to learn from the mistake once, and then leave it all behind. It has always been easier said than done of course, but it's gotten easier over time; I hope you allow yourself the latitude to do the same.

I have tried to do similarly, although I do sometimes have a habit of carrying guilt a long time - and it can occasionally have the side effect of getting in the way of fully moving past mistakes and into doing better. It's something to work on.
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