Ask HN: My startup has failed. What comes next?

When the failures come with emotional problems, well, then it's harder. For me? I think it's a bad idea to go to my contacts when my performance is below a certain level, because... I'm just not performing up to my usual standards, and actually doing a job with people who expect me to perform at the level of most of my friends would be a challenge when I'm fully functional. And when I'm really messed up? expecting me to perform at the level I've been capable of performing at in the past is a bit unrealistic.

But, the problem is that my job is absolutely central to who I am. I'm not going to get better until I get a job and feel like I'm making forward progress at that job. That's just how I work.

So... personally? I go through body shops when I'm like this. Why? Mostly because employers don't go for the body shop until they've exhausted their contacts. They don't know any more good people, so they'll settle for warm bodies. And depressed-me can meet those standards, usually. I'll probably even have enough skill-margin for them to put up with the downsides of me still being messed up.

And eh, I've had good luck with getting help from the managers; I mean, my big problem is staying on-task, and that gets way worse when I'm not in a good place, mentally, and my experience? managers in those situations seem to be pretty cool with me asking them for help with that sort of thing. I think they know the score, too. They know they're gonna get second-raters from the body shop, and they're willing to put some effort if it looks like some effort can turn you into something useful.

When the economy is good like this, most of the gigs you will find are "contract to hire" - meaning you work for them for a year, and if the economy is still good in a year, they'll offer to hire you on full-time, which gives you a nice path forward, if you still need training wheels after the first year is up. When the economy is bad, that expectation isn't set, but the rules are about the same either way.

Oh yeah, to get a body shop job? put your resume on DICE. take the calls, listen carefully, reject jobs you aren't qualified for (the body shops aren't qualified to do that, and you will go to a lot of interviews for jobs you aren't qualified for if you don't take charge of the filtering)

But yeah, especially if you are in the bay area, body shops are like a million times better than e-lance

I do agree that the journey really has been worth it, although I haven't actually got anything to show for it.

My first startup didn't go that badly, which is why it left me with enough cash for rainy day during my 2nd / 3rd startup.

So without saying, yes the 2nd and 3rd crashed n burnt pretty badly.

Experience after 2nd:

I know this might sound meta, but your sanity and your self worth more than anything else and that's what you should be looking at. I was a noob by all means when I did my 2nd startup, because my first startup had an early acquisition which I didn't really go through a lot of things. So due to that my 2nd time it left me with a lot of bruises of rookie mistakes.

It was awful, but I decided take school and help me forget about Startups, business and the sorts of things I was obsessed was before. So this helped because I got to talk to people whom were not necessarily talking startup and business, which diverts your anger/disappointment towards something different.

After 3rd startup:(run out of money, quite literally)

After my 2nd startup I had enough cash to not get a job, but this time around I had a lot more pressure which left me with no choice, but getting a job. I had some great investors whom knew why I fall into this situation, which helped a lot.

Few things I did:

1- I put behind everything I was hopping for before, because I knew that I have reached a new low (which is not good).

2- Making new hopes!

3- I started fresh (joined a tiny startup and worked for them like it was my first ever time programming / building a team).

Things learned:

1- I wouldn't jump into another startup of your own. (don't, just don't) The pressure becomes too much and productivity tanks.

2- Make sure you agree on leaving behind the miseries of a startup to start something new (aka joining a team). It's a good time to let go of things when you feel your shoulder is holding too much.

3- Your sanity and your life is the most precious thing you have, after my 3rd startup I had death threats and that was the reason I had to let it go. So things like that shows you how cheap life can be in others eyes, while for you, that is the biggest asset you have your control over.

So feeling shitty or guilt shouldn't stop you from going into something new.

Also, if you have enough of experience with programming and building, then you can do some consulting or freelancing very easily.

PS: if you're in based States don't freaking try Elance or Odesk. Because that will just destroy your thoughts more, it's like race to the bottom for prices. Try using HN (Who is Hiring) or Reddit /r/forhire or Twitter or friends to get some gig.

Ah and one last thing, ego and pride can be hard to get over, but don't bury them, because these times will be your medal of honor and soon enough you can feel proud of them.