Ask HN: How to develop a growth mindset?

For example, installing a router and setting up a wifi network can seem like an unfathomably complex topic to an older person who's lived their life mostly via paperwork. But it's not that hard! And that person could almost definitely sort out how to do it with a little time and effort. You probably have examples of this in your own life.

So then, just flip it. That challenging thing that seems out of reach? Just assume you're the older person setting up wifi - assuming the thing is much more complicated and difficult than it actually is. It only seems so daunting because you have no exposure to that specific topic. If you just rip the bandaid and start learning about it a bit, you'll almost always discover that the individual steps to get started (for almost anything) are completely within reach.

For me, that thought process always gives me enough confidence to try. If I find out the thing is actually too hard, so be it. But usually, it isn't. Usually it's surprisingly easy!

That said, don't over-think / over-focus. Be sure to devote some time to experimenting / R&D.

A growth mindset is not a goal, it's an iterative process.

You believe in innate talent vs you believe in practice and hardwork.

Failure indicates that you don't have it vs curiosity around why it did not work this time.

Criticism or feedback is taken personally vs Feedback is a way to learn.

You are constantly looking at others to validate your talent vs You are measuring and developing your own yardsticks for growth.

As per my understanding, you can have growth mindset in one sphere of your life and have fixed mindset in another. For e.g. a person I recently met, has fixed mindset around programming, but has a growth mindset on the subject of maths.

What does all this result in? Our self-talk about the activity at hand will tell us what mindset we have.

Do we tell ourselves: "I am not good enough", "I will never be good at this". Are we constantly looking at others to gauge what they perceive of us or our abilities?

We then need to transform all these into

1. "I am not good at this right now, but if I work at it, I will".

2. "Everyone struggles. It's just not me. Everyone has spent time and effort to become good at it." "Everyone finds learning a new thing hard and challenging"

3. What is stopping me from continuing right now? "Am i tired?", "Am I hungry?" or is it my regular pattern of avoiding pain of learning? Can I transform this towards curiosity?

To move towards growth mindset we need to approach it with a sense of play. With a sense of curiosity towards what we are trying to learn or develop into. We also need to be aware of how are feelings are involved and what they are pushing us to do or avoid.

The point is to take some steps towards the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow now and then, and enjoying the walk.

So sometimes, act a bit more curious than you feel. Remind yourself that what you're doing is actually fun more often (or if you can't, switch to something that is). And then who knows.