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Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

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Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#21

Post by smt88 »

velikos wrote: post #13
smt88 wrote: post #3

1. None of your decisions are important. I'm not saying that to belittle you. I'm saying it because you can worry yourself sick if you're afraid of doing the wrong thing. Life is a balance between "analysis paralysis" and jumping into things too quickly. You should lean toward jumping too quickly. Even if you make some small mistakes, be open-minded and willing to learn from them, and you'll be able to recover. It ta…

> For example, a company that exclusively uses Haskell or Scala is probably not a great idea. Wow, you and I are totally at odds on this one.

At the beginning of a career?

I'm not saying "don't learn Haskell/Scala" or "never work at a company that uses Haskell/Scala". I'm saying that early on, you want to have widely-used technology on your resume, and then you can start to find a niche.

If your first and only job is at a Haskell shop, it's going to be much harder to get a job at a place that uses something more mainstream.

Does that make sense? This reflects popularity only, not the quality of the technology.

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#22

Post by 7Figures2Commas »

kleer001 wrote: post #20
magic_beans wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, because on your death bed you'll remember fondly the growing number in your bank account.

Not all. I hope to die broke, having perfectly timed my expenditures. I joke. It's really because as I age I will be able to afford the comforts and convenience I've grown quite fond of. I will be able to take care of myself and loved ones in emergencies and afford insurance. But in the end it answers OP's question. And since my life is different from yours I gave a different answer. If you feel my answer is inapprop…

> It's really because as I age I will be able to afford the comforts and convenience I've grown quite fond of. I will be able to take care of myself and loved ones in emergencies and afford insurance.

You seem to be making a number of flawed assumptions here.

The first is that you will age. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. You could be hit by a truck tomorrow and die. The second is that access to the comforts and conveniences you have grown fond of are primarily a function of your finances. But your enjoyment of the comforts and conveniences you can afford is also a function of many other things, such as your health, which could be compromised at any time by things you cannot predict or control.

> If you feel my answer is inappropriate...

I think your answer is likely to evoke a strong response because it paints exploring intimate relationships and accumulating wealth as being mutually exclusive.

This flies in the face of data that suggests one of the best ways to accumulate wealth is to partner up. Marriage has been linked to wealth in numerous studies, and by some estimates, more than 90% of the millionaires in the United States are married.

Obviously, marriage motivated by financial gain is probably not advisable for most, but avoiding dating out of the belief that it will produce financial benefit is not very attractive either.

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#23

Post by mikestew »

My 20 year old self? Lessee, doing a little math here...okay, got it: in a few years a software company called Microsoft will IPO. Take every spare dime and buy shares. Continue to do so until about 1999, then sell all of it.

In all seriousness? You're not as clever as you think you are, so try being less of an asshole. Even when you are the smartest person in the room, no one cares, so quit being so insufferable. Spend more time with your musical instrument; you'll never go pro, but it will add enjoyment to your life and sometimes that of others, and when you're older you'll regret having not played more when your were younger.

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#25

Post by suprjami »

loumf wrote: post #19

When I was 22, I wrote some advice for me for when I was 40, which I followed (at 43), and it wasn't bad, although he was kind of a jerk about it.

I'd be interested to know what advise you had for yourself 20 years in the future, and how realistic that advice was?

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#28

Post by veidr »

First: Learn the essentials of personal finance: savings, taxes, credit.

You already know how to calculate how much your credit-card-augmented lifestyle is costing you, but you don't — why? Why on earth are you going to take out a loan on a new car next month when you could just buy a used Audi for cash?

Go smoke a joint, introspect on why you have that flaw in your character, and fix it.

Next: You will eventually decide to have kids. When you do, this life will be over. A new, different life will begin. Aside from whatever satisfaction you do or don't get out of the new aspects, one of the main differences will be the amount of your time and energy you can devote to pursuits like making software, writing novels, building a company, etc will be reduced by about 80%. So this is your window. Don't let your youth go to your head. You are in the first year of only 10 or 15 that you have left where what you do is totally up to you.

Finally: Stop smoking cigarettes immediately, you stupid little fuck.

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#29

Post by austinjp »

Do one thing and do it well. StIck with it. Excel. Get lessons, teach yourself, push yourself. Do it for the love of doing it.

Don't compare yourself to anyone else.

Two marshmallows later rather than one now.

Hang onto those old friends. Even the ones who can be dicks, provided they're not always dicks.

Tell your family you love them because one day it won't be possible.

Learn to love and forgive yourself so you can love and forgive others. Practice loving kindness.

Stop smoking weed.

Introverts lose energy to others and gain energy from isolation, but isolation should be in small doses to avoid de-socialisation.

Get fit, stay fit. Lift weights. Learn martial arts.

Get outdoors. Go up mountains and jump into the ocean.

Ultimately, it's all okay :)

Re: Ask HN: What would you tell your 20 something years old self?

#30

Post by loco5niner »

insoluble wrote: post #6

Never assume that those around you, even close friends or family members, care about your best interests or future. Chances are their actions are based on their own best interests, even when it involves you. There is a fair chance they are not even considering your future in any of their actions. This is not to say that you should not care about others, but that for many people, the only one looking out for you is yo…

Except Mom.
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