Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

131–140 of 405 posts

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#131

Post by NetOpWibby »

I wish I had something helpful to add.

My teenager has been involved with inappropriate texting with an assuming friend and the textual contents were, quite frankly, disturbing. Therapists say that this is normal these days. Our teen has refused to stop being friends with this person and even suggested that we just get over it. To that end, her phone is locked down with ScreenTime limits but she's somehow getting more time.

The influence of other classmates cannot be underestimated.

Hearing from therapists and other parents that we're doing the best we can is super fucking frustrating because our best isn't amounting to jack shit.

Every kid is different though. Our youngest doesn't seem like he'll be much of a problem but we'll see.

I guess I'll end this mini rant with: good luck and godspeed.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#132

Post by kridsdale1 »

ikiris wrote: post #118
ericmcer wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What there is 100% a precedent for prohibiting certain activities from minors because their brains are undeveloped. In the future we will view a child spending hours a day on Tiktok how we currently view a kid smoking cigarettes. It is creating an entire generation of anxious, ADHD addled kids who struggle with school and focused work of any kind.

[citation needed] for evidence that somehow TikTok is at all responsible for causing adhd

Bruh we have a decade of Research on this. Go type some words in to Google Scholar.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#133

Post by bkandel »

webdood90 wrote: post #70
qwerpy wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I used to judge parents who resorted to tablets to keep their children quiet. I don't really anymore. You don't know how exhausted the parents might be or how many hours they've already spent trying to entertain their kids in a more wholesome manner. I've taken a 2 year old on vacation and some of that time is spent going to unique restaurants that take a couple of hours for a meal. My toddler would get bored and squ…

Man, if you don't want to deal with the challenges of children, why have kids? I don't lie to myself, I know I couldn't do it and I didn't. Maybe you just don't get to go out for dinner or ride on planes until they don't need to be hypnotized with a screen? You know it's bad for them but you're putting your comforts and freedoms above theirs and everybody else's. I can't help but feel like the next generation has bee…

This is so off-base I don't even know where to begin. "Maybe you just don't get to ... ride on planes" -- so the kids never get to meet their grandparents or great-grandparents who are too unwell to make the trip because you won't give them a screen for an hour or two? Like everything else in life, dealing with screens is a balance. Every day for multiple hours is too much; a couple hours on twice-yearly trips is not going to have any effect on them.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#134

Post by kridsdale1 »

stephenhuey wrote: post #101
rahimnathwani wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I find the overall approach fascinating, but I chuckled at this part because CDs are digital: "I've developed a analog->digital path for my kids. Before they can get a music player, they get a CD player." If anyone wants to start with analogue, perhaps start with vinyl, then cassette tape, and then CD. I had a cassette player before a record player, but vinyl seems easier to grok because you can use a steel needle to…

I get what scop meant. Family vehicles had cassette or 8-track players when I was a kid and I figured out how to use my parents' record player, but for the purposes of what he was getting at, CDs are a more "analog" experience than streaming music, and give you a feel for what playing an album is like. You have to physically put in and remove the disc to change the music, whereas streaming gives you any song at your…

I think it’s fair enough to call a CD analog because the data stream is nothing for than wave amplitudes. It doesn’t use a Fourier transform or compression or require “software”.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#135

Post by kridsdale1 »

Mr-Frog wrote: post #125
AstralStorm wrote: post #81

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is way too slow and thus will be only effective in baiting your kids to try it early or harder. Or give them an anti-tech superiority complex which is counterproductive. I'd say you need to start actually explaining how things work on these more advanced platforms immediately, as well as healthy patterns in use so they do not get sucked into it forever. And that these things are tools. It can be done ELI3, thoug…

> anti-tech superiority complex which is counterproductive I didn't have a phone until significantly after my peers, so I used our family computer, Instagram's undocumented API, and a variety of SMS forwarding solutions to keep in touch with my friends, which I think definitely sparked my interest in hacking and a career in software. I developed a superiority complex, but it was more anti-conformity and pro-hacking t…

This complex is deserved.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#136

Post by kridsdale1 »

tylerc230 wrote: post #76

A lot of parents at our school signed a “wait until 8” pledge to wait until 8th grade before getting them smartphones. This way there will be less social pressure from their friends to be connected. My assumption is that without a smartphone they won’t use social media.

Meanwhile I spent every minute of free time from 2000-2005 using phpbb, irc, and aim, on a big CRT and PC

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#137

Post by garrickvanburen »

elevatedastalt wrote: post #116
garrickvanburen wrote: post #51

I've 4 kids, the youngest is 11. The rule in the house is; 1) no social media accounts until 13 and 2) one of your parents will be your 'friend' on that account. This is actually a pretty great expression of "kids keep you young." But, right now is right now and how kids communicate with each other is constantly changing - social media or not. So, if you're not a parent to a tween or teens now - I'd say you have litt…

> one of your parents will be your 'friend' That doesn't do much since they will just keep the spicy posts hidden from the parent.

You're presuming a great deal here.

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#139

Post by [deleted] »

kridsdale1 wrote: post #135
Mr-Frog wrote: post #125

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> anti-tech superiority complex which is counterproductive I didn't have a phone until significantly after my peers, so I used our family computer, Instagram's undocumented API, and a variety of SMS forwarding solutions to keep in touch with my friends, which I think definitely sparked my interest in hacking and a career in software. I developed a superiority complex, but it was more anti-conformity and pro-hacking t…

This complex is deserved.

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: How do you prevent the impact of social media on your children?

#140

Post by kridsdale1 »

gameman144 wrote: post #83
webdood90 wrote: post #70

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Man, if you don't want to deal with the challenges of children, why have kids? I don't lie to myself, I know I couldn't do it and I didn't. Maybe you just don't get to go out for dinner or ride on planes until they don't need to be hypnotized with a screen? You know it's bad for them but you're putting your comforts and freedoms above theirs and everybody else's. I can't help but feel like the next generation has bee…

I feel like this mindset is part of why so many people are nervous about having kids, and I couldn't disagree with it more. Your kid is not an optimization problem, they're a part of your family. If you want to do something unique that's going to bore your kids, it's fine to give them something to do; a half hour of screen time while you enjoy that fancy restaurant while traveling is fine. Your kid will be fine. Some…

This is not the typical coastal educated elite liberal mindset. The social pressure to treat birth as a permanent phase change (good term) is immense.
Post reply on HN