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Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

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Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#131

Post by ehnto »

sz4kerto wrote: post #25

Listen to John Danaher (world famous BJJ coach interviewed by Lex Fridman). He talks about that the greatest fighters pick their battles very well, and they often get submitted in the gym because they intentionally put themselves in handicapped positions so that they can learn how to get out (and sometimes that doesn't work out, of course). So life situations where stakes are not high should be used to run high-risk…

Great examples of your last point in most speed sports. The quickest competitors always look like they're extreme risk takers, but it's more likely they've had ample time experiencing mistakes and as such, they know their ability to recover well enough to deduce a good safety margin.

I love watching ragged edge hill climb segments or peak performance downhill mountain biking runs, they're this weird blend of composure and moments of recovery, and you can see them pushing through each small mistake fearlessly, as they're so familiar with them.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#132

Post by carapace »

I'm going to mention this because it helped me a lot. It's kooky, pseudoscientific, and bizarre, but it does seem to work, for me and for a lot of people. And if it doesn't work for you, well, at least it's completely harmless. It's a very very simple procedure, involving tapping with your finger on certain locations on your body while focusing on your particular issue in a certain way. You don't have to pay for anything or attend a course, all the information is in a PDF manual that's freely available. You don't have to believe in the "theory" behind it. Normally I would link to the Wikipedia page about it, but WP is too Skeptical these days so the article is all about how it's "not real". Ignore that and try it anyway. If it helps, it helps, and if it doesn't you've only wasted a half an hour or so. It's really simple. The basic "algorithm" fits on a page.

https://web.archive.org/web/20160303213253/http://www.spirit...

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#134

Post by ehnto »

MivLives wrote: post #95

What helps me is a bit odd. Stealing a quote from Douglas Adams “The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” Basically I just start without thinking about it, preferably without realizing it. If I keep giving myself a schedule (I'll start this in an hour, I'll start when the clock hits fifteen past) I'll find ways…

I taught myself to turn off my computer really quickly, if I am procrastinating before leaving the house. Rather than making it a big decision, or a super important moment, it's just a blink of an eye and then there's no more computing holding my attention. I can do it before really appreciating that I've even made a decision, it's almost like pulling a sneaky one on myself.

In the same way you don't think explicitly about putting your right shoe on after you've put your on left, I try to make it so I don't think about turning off the computer during the moments I try to leave the house.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#136

Post by anon2020dot00 »

For me, I think it would help to just write a plan down and then just execute it.

Also, just set aside a time for it like with working in an office, work is from 8 am to 5 pm so can't indulge in too many distractions during that time and so body gets used to doing intellectual work during that time. Consistency helps the body gets used to it like with a consistent sleep schedule.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#137

Post by hprotagonist »

spaetzleesser wrote: post #86
hprotagonist wrote: post #69

Earlier quoted context omitted.

OP seems to be in an educational context, in which you swallow your fear, go to office hours, spill your guts, and usually are pleasantly astonished to discover that the group you need is already there and you can start improving immediately.

"You must move beyond your shame and guilt that keeps you afraid and alone, and you must have a regular two-way relationship with a community of your peers and betters that you all use to help each other out of these sorts of blocking situations." I'll second this. Realizing that you aren't alone is a big relief.

noone is equipped to carry that burden alone; realizing that early is a superpower.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#138

Post by TameAntelope »

Professional help. Nobody is going to be able to help you without knowing the specifics of your problem, and nobody here knows the specifics of your problem.

There are a million ways that people have gotten through these kinds of issues, because there are a million people, and each person needed something different. Either you can risk failing to find your "thing" that will get you through, or you can enlist the help of someone who's trained in helping people like you.

It'd be like trying to operate on yourself; you'd never think to do it, so why do you think you'd be able to self-treat your behavioral injury?

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#139

Post by andsoitis »

I can't tell you: "Don't be anxious."

I can't tell you: "Don't be afraid."

I can't tell you: "Just take the first small step."

I cannot use reason, logic, or statistics to try to convince you that the thing you're afraid of is no reason to be afraid of it.

Deep self-reflection, meditation and/or professional help is all I can suggest, but is even that good advice, given it can be reasoned away as "won't work"?

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#140

Post by bowsamic »

BubbleRings wrote: post #129
bowsamic wrote: post #104

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> As a person in long term recovery from alcohol and drug addiction What has this got to do with anything? Dysthymia isn't an addiction or "horrible circumstances". It isn't even particularly severe, it's just moderately meh all the time. Most people don't seek treatment because they assume it's just part of their personality: "I'm just a negative person" or "I just don't like making friends" etc. You don't have a cl…

Quoted post unavailable.

Please try and be less rude

I already said it isn’t like normal depression, you ignored this…

Unfortunately in the dysthymia community we have to deal with a lot of people that are ignorant to the disorder, you sound like you haven’t even heard the word dysthymia before today. Most people, even many doctors, are not properly aware of it. You should research it

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