How are you so sure that your problems at work really stem from work, instead of being symptomatic of a deeper personal problem you might externalizing onto work? Is the coat of looking for a new job really that high? If your problem keeps worsening, that may eventually be eclipsed by the need to maintain your mental health. If not, then why can't you resolve the problems of work at work?
Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
131–140 of 244 posts
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#132I think you need to deal with this before you get to the edge point. You need a way to understand your own emotions and why you are feeling like that, and start to resolve underlying things like stress, strained relationships, existential angst like what is the point of work etc. I find praying to Jesus the Messiah helps me a lot.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#133Hey bud, you aren't alone and, while I can't promise that everything will be roses, I can promise that you aren't alone. However, I need to ask you a very serious question. You don't have to answer in public because it is a very personal thing. But, what do you mean by moments when you want to snap? And, when you say 'the edge point', what are you on the edge of? If it's anger, have you ever thought of anger manageme…
Thanks for offering. This is very kind. Just anger for me.
If I am in that much trouble, definitely will seek for help.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#134Take a long walk home.
"I can't! I live far away from my job." Yes you can: get out on a bus/train/whatever stop before your home. 1 hour walking is ~5 Km.
"I drive home bro." So park it 5 km before your work.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#135How are you so sure that your problems at work really stem from work, instead of being symptomatic of a deeper personal problem you might externalizing onto work? Is the coat of looking for a new job really that high? If your problem keeps worsening, that may eventually be eclipsed by the need to maintain your mental health. If not, then why can't you resolve the problems of work at work?
I'm guessing you're one of those lucky ones with a sane manager that values your productivity, nurtures growth by rewarding good work, and keeps a good tab on past accomplishments whilst protecting you when others make unrealistic or untimely demands of you, and intervenes only with actual wisdom rather than nonsensical judgement or belittling comments.
Consider yourself one of the few lucky ones. The rest of us have to deal with some degree of micromanagement, office politics, and other such nonsense on an almost daily basis.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#136Workout, meditation, distraction, talking with people didn't work for me. They were ways to silent the emotions and postpone the problem. What worked for me was a lot of self reflexion. Understanding way I was angry in the first place. I found out that happiness is just the way of approaching things. That the world is just a projection on your head. An interpretation of the five senses + state (learned experience mos…
I found this book very helpful in approaching some of the things OP talks about.
https://www.amazon.com/Anger-Cooling-Thich-Nhat-Hanh/dp/1573...
Also, check your blood pressure regularly every morning and evening, for a few weeks. You could be non-symptomatically hypertensive (for all sorts of reasons); talk to your doctor if you find your blood pressure consistently on the higher side.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#137Thanks for all the great advices and comments here.
Every job has its ups and downs. Though I agree that if you constantly feel down time, that probably the time you take a break.
What I find hard is that no single method works for me for a very long time. (Probably because it can trigger the bad memory? ) So I need to find a new approach when I find the old one does not work any more.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#138I know some people here have suggested jumping to another position, which certainly is a viable option, but consider the fact that emotional hardship will always occur in our lifetimes. Similarly, it's worth gaining some self-awareness around why things are activating, whether they be good or bad (activating or deregulating your system in a heightened state or a low-energy state). My advice is see a therapist on a so…
Yeah, therapy has done wonders for my ability to take action instead of letting frustration build up. For me, your emotions are your emotions, you can't just leave them behind. But you can often release them in a constructive way or at least vent them a bit :)
You can't wish them away, no. But if you change the right habits of mind (not saying that's easy) you'll have less negative emotions in need of unpleasant metabolizing in the first place.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#139Learn an instrument.
Re: Ask HN: How to not bring emotion from work back home?
#140For me getting hooked to something else I am passionate about takes me away from work worries. I am currently hooked to Self-Driving Cars, doing a Nanodegree from Udacity.