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Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

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Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#121

Post by madrox »

poulpy123 wrote: post #70
madrox wrote: post #19

There's a lot here to unpack, but I don't believe this is a red flag. CS is not a "gimme" major. If he's continuing to pursue it and the college isn't weeding him out, then he's clearly doing alright and has enough enthusiasm for the major. Let him continue. On a more personal note, I don't believe this is any of your business. Your son is a grown adult. Perhaps he's getting a degree on your dime, but he needs to mak…

I disagree with you on the general but agree on the specific here. I think parents need to be reasonably involved with their children even when they are students, but here the child seems to do well so there is no reason to worry

I tend to agree with you. Hard to unpack all this nuance in an HN comment. I've found that there's a middle ground between "making" a child do something and being involved in their life.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#123

Post by gidorah »

wfleming wrote: post #25

I don’t think tinkering outside work/class is required to be a good programmer. Nobody rags on accountants for not fiddling with spreadsheets as a hobby. I think the frequent expectation in tech that programmers live & breath code all the time is actually pretty unhealthy. I got into programming as a hobby, but the longer I’ve been a professional at it the less I do in my free time because I just don’t think it’s men…

I am an accountant. Can confirm that my clients would be unimpressed if I had learned the trade by tinkering on accounts.

Coding seems to be a minority career where there is expected to have an extracurricular interest in it.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#124

Post by wilg »

Symbiote wrote: post #90
wilg wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not an incorrect word, but it can be possibly misconstrued as being infantilizing, because "child" somewhat implies a young person. But I can't think of a better word! Perhaps it could have been more a bit more tactful to reword to avoid saying "child", like saying "your son is doing well" in this case.

Son or daughter avoids the possibility of infantalizing an adult child.

That’s what I said. Unfortunate that there is no obvious way to make it gender neutral.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#125

Post by readonthegoapp »

one path that seems to do well is get a heavy tech degree than do anything-but-heavy-tech when you get out -- something like solutions engineer, sales engineer, success engineer, sales, consulting, etc. -- stuff that might only require 30 min/day of coding, if that -- possibly more install, configuration, troubleshooting, etc.

the CS background can be very helpful for understanding computer-related tech.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#126

Post by anonreeeeplor »

steve_adams_86 wrote: post #74
anonreeeeplor wrote: post #72

I have an in-law who is the goofy, super lazy kid. Can’t be bothered to do anything. We sent him to school for like 1 semester and he didn’t go to class and just screwed around. His SAT scores off the charts. He just sort of codes and is a genius and doesn’t give a crap or have super crazy aspirations or ambitions. It drove me insane. Zomg your wasted potential! Honestly coding really sucks. Like I don’t know why any…

I’m not about to claim I’m particularly good at programming, but you absolutely nailed why I like it and, in a sense, why I can endure something that would otherwise be excruciatingly boring. I have a million things I want to do and programming can help me do them faster or better. Or it can help me explore different aspects of ideas in novel ways. I can generate art, automate a hydroponic garden, point my telescope…

I took one course for programming in college and it was so awful. I stopped going.

Then I did a two week project to build a little game. That little game taught me more in two weeks than the whole semester.

I took the tests and passed them no problem after doing that one little self directed game.

If you find something that lights your fire, you learn 10,000x.

Especially if you have ADHD or Aspergers or whatever.

If I can trigger my interests I will put perform everyone by years in a few weeks.

But I can’t always reliably find ways to trigger my interests.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#127

Post by lordkrandel »

shanebellone wrote: post #119
lordkrandel wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's why financially dependent persons don't vote or drive. Come to Italy, you'll find people aged 35 who live with their parents and are financially dependent even with a Ph.D. and an academic researcher career. You're so biased.

I'm aware of both instances. I'd argue that the European approach is better. However, if someone is paying your bills, they get to set the rules for continued financial support. Disillusionment is the result of entitlement.

You're missing the main point: the rules for continued financial support don't dictate how adult a person is: how conscentious he can be, the hard decisions he can make, how he manages responsabilities with the people he cares about. Maybe the adult lives with the parents because it's the most adult thing to do and will will leave if these conditions are no longer met. And yet, you're judging those persons as "non-adult" just because of a prejudice. I repeat myself: so much bias.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#128

Post by dns_snek »

wfleming wrote: post #25

I don’t think tinkering outside work/class is required to be a good programmer. Nobody rags on accountants for not fiddling with spreadsheets as a hobby. I think the frequent expectation in tech that programmers live & breath code all the time is actually pretty unhealthy. I got into programming as a hobby, but the longer I’ve been a professional at it the less I do in my free time because I just don’t think it’s men…

I don't think tinkering outside work/class throughout your life is required to be a good programmer, but it teaches you extremely valuable skills early on, such as setting goals and working to achieve them, breaking problems down into manageable pieces. You will encounter various issues of all kinds and learn how to look for solutions online. You also learn how to find and use documentation, you'll probably encounter industry-standard tools such as Git, learn the basics of Unix-like systems and a lot more, depending on what you're tinkering with.

I wouldn't expect someone who's 35 with 10 years of professional experience to tinker outside of work, but I'd raise an eyebrow at someone looking for a programming job straight out of college who doesn't have a single side project to share, no matter how small or insignificant.

To me that says that they don't enjoy programming, it would be like hiring a mechanic who's never worked on their own car. Programming can be hard and stressful so you need to enjoy it to persevere through problems that leave you scratching your head, otherwise you'll quickly burn out and be out looking for another job.

I'm not advocating for people to sit in a dark room 12 hours a day and grind through Leetcode problems, or to spend all of their free time programming to prove themselves and "get ahead of the competition". However I've never met a programmer who's never showed interest in tinkering at any stage of their life.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#129

Post by shanebellone »

lordkrandel wrote: post #127
shanebellone wrote: post #119

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm aware of both instances. I'd argue that the European approach is better. However, if someone is paying your bills, they get to set the rules for continued financial support. Disillusionment is the result of entitlement.

You're missing the main point: the rules for continued financial support don't dictate how adult a person is: how conscentious he can be, the hard decisions he can make, how he manages responsabilities with the people he cares about. Maybe the adult lives with the parents because it's the most adult thing to do and will will leave if these conditions are no longer met. And yet, you're judging those persons as "non-ad…

"Personally, independence defines adulthood."

The word personally starts that sentence to indicate opinion. All opinion is biased. Yours is too.

Re: Ask HN: Son is major in CS, but doesn't code. Red flag?

#130

Post by cweagans »

derstander wrote: post #114
cweagans wrote: post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I think parents need to be reasonably involved with their children even when they are students, but here the child seems to do well so there is no reason to worry OP is talking about a full grown adult. Not a child.

> OP is talking about a full grown adult. Not a child. This is an interesting tangent to me. What makes a full grown adult? Is it being able to drive a car? Being able to serve in the military? Being able to drink? Vote? In the state where I grew up, these were all different ages. And then there’s the scientific notion of when the brain is “finished” developing and maturing in the mid- to late-20s.

In the context of the original ask, I would say "legally allowed to make their own gd decisions about what to study". No idea why OP feels the need to insert himself into that process.
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