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What you describe looks how agile was supposed to be. What the op described looks like a perversion of agile perpetrated by managers who either don't understand why agile was born, or do understand it, but only care about increasing their power instead of getting things done.
I know. When I first read the XP book by Kent Beck it was a revelation. That was the first time I saw a methodology that I felt worked and agreed with my own experience. Planning everything out in advance is hopeless. There are two great quotes that I think capture this: “A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that worked.” John Gall “Enlightened trial and error outperfor…
After 20 years that's been my experience