I’m surprised at the amount of dismissive comments. Would we say the same things to someone depressed - ah that’s just life, have you tried running a marathon?
Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
101–110 of 158 posts
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#102I think we can all slow down a bit more. I have seen more companies move from an “innovation” stance to one of “perseverance”. Who knows when we will hit bottom.
I wrote a book about this feeling of ennui. I thought it was linked with technology addiction given my consumption habits. I think we’re desperately looking for community but the facade of always being connected plays these tricks on us. I think talking about these things openly will do just as much as therapy will.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#103Too be honestly, I feel like society at large causes burnout. I read a very complete account of my grandfathers early life (before he joined the military during WW2) and the kinda shit he did living of a farm is stuff of fairytales. When someone in the 20 mile radius needed a barn built, LITERALLY EVERYONE came to help. When you were off work for the night, you would sit with your whole family and read the newspaper…
> My friends would rather play video games on discord than go and play cards in person.
I hear that. I was born in '88, and although I played plenty of video games growing up, I remember playing a ton of card games with friends and family as a kid. After college, I pretty much stopped playing video games entirely and did all of my socializing in person. 10 years later COVID happened, and facing the prospect of being locked in my house indefinitely, I decided to get my very first gaming computer. It's honestly been a wonderful distraction from the stress of life, but a part of me feels dirty about playing video games so frequently. Although COVID is effectively over and everything is open again, I still find myself preferring the comfort and convenience of Discord + games over doing things physically in the world.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#104Too be honestly, I feel like society at large causes burnout. I read a very complete account of my grandfathers early life (before he joined the military during WW2) and the kinda shit he did living of a farm is stuff of fairytales. When someone in the 20 mile radius needed a barn built, LITERALLY EVERYONE came to help. When you were off work for the night, you would sit with your whole family and read the newspaper…
OP here . Thank you . I feel stuck here in the US too since my family lives in a different country but I cannot move back because spouse and her family live here and the US has better prospects for kids . But I feel stuck in my career since I have become pigeonholed into support engineering roles , no strong friend group having grown up abroad and nothing to do apart from look at stuff on my phone and feeling left be…
My advice to you would to be just to do stupid shit you think you probably wouldn’t like. Seriously.
We as people in modern society have spent our whole life around the idea that we need to have fun and enjoy everything, if not directly than indirectly.
I made some friends by hitting up some people I went to high school with like 6 years after graduation. They love offroading. So we now take turns taking out the big jeep and mudding. Once a month we bring a bunch of alcohol and have one person be the DD and drive around a bunch of drunk people in the thick mud, rough terrain, and underbrush.
Is that my idea of fun? Hell no. But because I’m doing something with people that I can get along with, I can enjoy aspects of it. And that led me to be ingrained in part of “their group”, so I have a small community.
Break out of your shell in ways that you think are dumb or weird, and try and make it fun despite the “weirdness”. You might find that it helps you feel community!
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#105When we wake up every morning, this is a wide range of options available to us, and we only see a tiny sliver of them. When we do the same thing we did yesterday, we will see that option more clearly tomorrow, and other options less clearly. Our agency narrows. When our options have narrowed too much, it can be hard to get unstuck. Hard to get out of the rut. Wake up, go to work, consume content, go to bed. Every day…
I really enjoyed reading your thoughts on this.
Running especially is useful for me too in this respect and I feel like you’re right about the root of the problems being how easy it is to avoid being bored.
I also wonder if deep thinking encourages us to live too much of a worry-driven internal life, and we avoid boredom for fear of overthinking.
Perhaps I should go for a run.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#106When we wake up every morning, this is a wide range of options available to us, and we only see a tiny sliver of them. When we do the same thing we did yesterday, we will see that option more clearly tomorrow, and other options less clearly. Our agency narrows. When our options have narrowed too much, it can be hard to get unstuck. Hard to get out of the rut. Wake up, go to work, consume content, go to bed. Every day…
This is so well written. I like lightcone analogy (even though you didn't mention it).
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#107Having kids during COVID has been super rough. All the talk about putting down your phone, looking away from the news, etc. doesn’t feel like a sufficient solution to me since, as a parent, my life went by in 5 to 10 minute snippets as I dealt with random issues from work, life, kids, and various crises that popped up inevitably. Taking what time I could get either laying down, or reading something on the Internet was pretty much all I got for a while.
I don’t know about you, but for me it is very slowly starting to lift. My kids are at school (sometimes), and I’m able to focus on things a little bit longer than I used to be able to. Maybe it’s just returning back to a non-chaotic rhythm that will get us out of this burnout.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#108I definitely feel burned out. It's not just recession, war, etc., it's also the depressing state of the software industry, particularly the niche I work in. It's the feeling that there is a better job out there but it's somehow out of reach. Also, inflation makes my way above average salary actually mediocre when it comes to buying things. I hate saving massive amounts of cash to buy some small property.
I am with you on above average salary. I can still easily pay for food, gas and electricity. But I see, that a list of things I can’t afford anymore is getting longer. A weekend in nice hotel for families just got out of reach. Vacation during local school holidays is slowly getting too expensive. New shiny car is simply too risky in current economic situation. I don’t want to imagine trying to survive as a teacher, police officer or a nurse.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#109The two best things I did for my mental health was leave Facebook (years ago) and stop watching the news. Hacker News is my news source (along with Ars Technica), I don't look at anything more political or world-eventy than these two sources, and I am selective about links even here. I can't even stomach NPR anymore.
More recently on the mental health front, I've been drawing more. I'm not great at it, but it is relaxing and distracting.
Also ambient or jazz--opinion-free, story-free music.
So I am still feeling burnt out, but it is a slower burn.
Re: Ask HN: Are we all burned out?
#110I am of the opinion that if all techies just learned ansible and used postgres, we could take more time off and chill a bit.