Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying? • Hacker News Board

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#101

Post by hoorayimhelping » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:41 PM UTC

I was in a similar spot as you: rationalizing an irrational fear I knew was irrational from an understanding of statistics and just common sense. How many planes did I watch fly overhead yesterday? How many actually crashed? Why am I so special that the plane I'm on will crash? It helped.

But I would always have this uncomfortable worry while flying. Any bump would jolt me from an uneasy sleep. I got over my that by facing my fears and fighting the irrational ignorance that came with it by educating myself. I went to my local private airport and asked about a discovery flight. I sat up in the cockpit and saw how a plane works. I asked the pilot what those bumps are and what those sounds are when they happen. I saw his process for taking off and landing, and preparing the plane for each configuration. It contextualized all the noises and horrifically scary (and in hindsight silly) moments where I was certain that the plane slowing down to extend its flaps for landing (like the most normal thing a plane can do) meant we were crashing.

I ended up with about 12 hours of stick time, but I had done enough takeoffs and landings to know that bumps are normal, you don't freak out when your car drives over a pothole, you shouldn't freak out when your plane flies over a patch of bumpy sky.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#102

Post by zhenekas » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:41 PM UTC

I had exactly the same issue. And i think what got me through was flying more often. It didnt get me completely anxiety free but i kinda sometimes forget about the fear. And also researching and flying only airlines that are considered safe. Its a bit more expensive but to me worth it. And also choosing driving or train when possible. Lots of options just try everything you can, we are all different something will work for you. Or not and you'll be afraif forever ... then use drugs

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#103

Post by PerfectElement » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:42 PM UTC

wbrinkley wrote: post #82

There's better advice here than thinking about the odds of a crash, but if that helps, you could also factor in the odds of actually dying in a crash - not just being in one - because that's even rarer. I was on a plane that experienced an "uncontained, catastrophic turbine engine failure" (Delta 1288) that killed two people a few rows behind me. It was traumatic, and I rented a car and drove home instead of flying,…

That must have been terrifying. Can you talk more about what happened between the moment the engine failed and the plane landed safely? How long did it take? Did the captain communicate with passengers frequently? How about flight attendants? What went through your mind? I'm nervous about flying and knowing what happens in this scenario may help me prepare.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#104

Post by hoorayimhelping » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:44 PM UTC

tayo42 wrote: post #84

api_or_ipa wrote: post #47

If you can stomach it, take some flying lessons. You'll be less scared of processes you understand. Start with a bunch of ground school, so you understand how the aircraft works, meteorology and the effort that goes into aircraft maintenance. Then, take a discover flight on a small aircraft and discover the love of aviation!

Can you take like a one off intro to flying and fly a plane? Or is it more involved then that?

Yes! A lot of private/instructional airports have what they call discovery or introductory flights. You sit in the cockpit of a Cessna with an instructor who takes you to a safe altitude and lets you do some turns and altitude changes in the plane, see the scenery, then takes you in and lands for you. The idea is you take this before you buy all the textbooks and commit to learning to fly to see if it's for you.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#105

Post by chrissnell » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:47 PM UTC

If you can afford it, fly first class. I don't have a fear of flying at all, but I get anxious from the crap that accompanies it: the rush through security to the gate, the cramped aisles during boarding, being thirsty and having to wait a long time for a drink or to use the bathroom. Buying a first class ticket takes care of almost all of this. I usually have to spend a couple of hundred extra on my own dime on top of the coach price that my employer pays for but it's worth it. I get to my destination relaxed, having spent the four hours stretched out, working on my laptop and sipping on a glass of scotch.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#106

Post by 0x4f3759df » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:51 PM UTC

PerfectElement wrote: post #103

wbrinkley wrote: post #82

There's better advice here than thinking about the odds of a crash, but if that helps, you could also factor in the odds of actually dying in a crash - not just being in one - because that's even rarer. I was on a plane that experienced an "uncontained, catastrophic turbine engine failure" (Delta 1288) that killed two people a few rows behind me. It was traumatic, and I rented a car and drove home instead of flying,…

That must have been terrifying. Can you talk more about what happened between the moment the engine failed and the plane landed safely? How long did it take? Did the captain communicate with passengers frequently? How about flight attendants? What went through your mind? I'm nervous about flying and knowing what happens in this scenario may help me prepare.

There's a show called 'Air Disasters' that you might be interested in, answers your questions for other flights.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#107

Post by akhilcacharya » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:54 PM UTC

I developed a fear of flying about 10 years ago because of a similar incident and lost it only a few years ago.

I'm a big plane buff so my problem used to be that I knew just enough to scare me - in my opinion, being rational rarely helps matters when you're in the moment. With that said, you should be aware of a few things.

1) Turbulence isn't dangerous to an aircraft. Very extreme turbulence is part of the design process of all aircraft - they test the airframe so that the wings can bend almost 30 degrees!

2) Even when going through turbulent air, the plane is not moving a significant amount compared to the height you are flying at. Very extreme turbulence might push you up or down several feet. You're traveling 30,000ft + above the ground. As long as you keep your seatbelt on you should be perfectly fine.

However, there are some things you can do to ameliorate these concerns when you're booking travel.

1) Fly on larger, more stable aircraft. Prefer A32X's, 737's and up over commuter jets or turboprops.

2) Pick seats near the wing. Generally turbulence is less well felt near the wings of the aircraft compared to the back or the front.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#108

Post by mrchucklepants » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:55 PM UTC

PerfectElement wrote: post #103

wbrinkley wrote: post #82

There's better advice here than thinking about the odds of a crash, but if that helps, you could also factor in the odds of actually dying in a crash - not just being in one - because that's even rarer. I was on a plane that experienced an "uncontained, catastrophic turbine engine failure" (Delta 1288) that killed two people a few rows behind me. It was traumatic, and I rented a car and drove home instead of flying,…

That must have been terrifying. Can you talk more about what happened between the moment the engine failed and the plane landed safely? How long did it take? Did the captain communicate with passengers frequently? How about flight attendants? What went through your mind? I'm nervous about flying and knowing what happens in this scenario may help me prepare.

It looks like the plane never left the runway.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delta_Air_Lines_Flight_1288

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#109

Post by up_and_up » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:55 PM UTC

I have had some fear of flying.

Read up on the science of turbulence and how robust these planes are. I occasionally still get waves of fear esp when they are descending fast with turbulence. But after really studying what turbulence is and how strong planes are engineered you will realize that it is very very unlikely turbulence would ever take down a plane.

Re: Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

#110

Post by S_A_P » Tue, Jul 31, 2018, 7:56 PM UTC

I can relate to this. What it really came down to with me was that I felt anxiety not about the plane crashing, but being in a situation that I cannot control. This mostly stems from my personal situation. I am a divorced dad of 2. I have access to my kids more than standard dad custody, but not as much as I would like. Most of my thoughts are around dying before I am able to see my kids grow up and make it into adulthood. I hate the thought of dying before they are grown and can have a real chance to know me on a deeper level than what parenting allows.