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Ask HN: How many of you feel lonely in a crowd?

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Re: Ask HN: How many of you feel lonely in a crowd?

#11

Yesterday a delivery guy asked me for directions and that interaction was my social high of the weekend. So yeah, I'm rather extremely lonely most of the time, but HN does not help me with that at all.

It’s the combativeness masquerading as deep, wise analysis.

Re: Ask HN: How many of you feel lonely in a crowd?

#12

I feel loneliest in a crowd. I have my wife and kids. And I talk to a couple of multi-year friends a couple of times a month. I have little opportunity to have chance encounters with the same people to begin forming friendships - I practically don't go anywhere due to family obligations and work. Best option would be church but I feel like a charlatan there as I'm not a religious believer.

Try humanist organizations. They don’t believe in any faith and might be more in align with your principles

Re: Ask HN: How many of you feel lonely in a crowd?

#15
post #14

Yesterday a delivery guy asked me for directions and that interaction was my social high of the weekend. So yeah, I'm rather extremely lonely most of the time, but HN does not help me with that at all.

What stops you from fixing it?

Negative mindset

Re: Ask HN: How many of you feel lonely in a crowd?

#17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's much harder to make close friends once you're not in school anymore. It's one thing they don't tell graduates.

I've found it's not necessarily "hard", but the strategies that worked in school don't work after graduating. At school friendships just kinda happen - afterwards, you need to work at it. I struggled for a while, in my first two years after uni and leading up to Covid. What helped me was: * Joining a very social team in a very social company. This was in 2019, and even though they went bankrupt and we all found other…

These are good suggestions.

I would add that D&D is extremely hit or miss, and don't be afraid to leave a group you aren't clicking with and find another one.

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