Effective wife selection is key here.
Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
11–20 of 345 posts
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#12From my experience founding companies, you've gotta commit 100% to it to have any chance of success. That doesn't mean working on an idea in your free time. Consider the fact that someone, or even a funded team of someones, are out there putting in 100% effort to solve the same problem. How are you going to outcompete if you're working on this problem in your spare time (which I imagine is quite limited having a wife and kids)?
You should also consider what success looks like for you. Do you want to start a company to gain creative freedom? Do you want a better lifestyle for your family? Are you prepared to spend the next 7 years on this endeavor? How will you balance the high workload (I'm talking non-stop work for a month at a time) with spending quality time with your family?
You should think through all of these questions, then have an honest conversation about it with your wife, and don't sugar-coat it. She might surprise you.
As far as funding goes... You'll want to put away a fund to pay your salary for at least the first 6 months. Your goal in those first 6 months will be to create a believable story you can sell to investors about your vision. If they like it, you'll be able to raise funds to continue working on it and to deliver that vision.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#13>Are all startups at my age generally side hustles that become profitable enough to quit my day job?
Pretty much yes. There is nothing wrong with it. Don't leave your job and don't forget your responsibilities. I am too doing this between kids sleeps etc whenever I find half-a-hour free to work on my projects. Yes it's slow and overwhelming but still a progress. I hope as kids grow, there will be more free time available.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#14I don't have experience doing so, but logically... don't quit your job and grind away for hours on a startup! You'll likely really regret it.
Some entrepreneurs start a side hustle, work on it in their spare time, and if it starts making good enough traction, then pour more into it. Have you considered this path?
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#15Talk. Get an idea. Talk to people that would use it. Don't build anything. Try to find two people that would hand you cash or better yet get cash now. IF, this works, and you are ready, hire two people on upwork to build it. IF, you get more customers, build out the features that helps you get more customers. If you do anything else than this, you are setup for relationship and financial doom.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#16My very concrete feelings on this is that you probably don't. Asking folks how to do this is a bit like asking billionaires how to get rich. It's a fun story but it's overfitting. The individual narrative that made a billionaire is unlikely to be available for you. If you ask some millionaires they may be more likely to give you some useful advice around sound investment strategies, living within your means, and iden…
I agree with the premise of this, but want to point out a normal job doesn’t necessarily lead to fulfilling those responsibilities adequately even though maybe they should. People still get stressed, overwork, have ambition, dislike home life, etc.
I think OP should talk with his wife and make a decision based on milestones
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#17I started my company with a wife, kids and mortage. I was in my 20s but I have no regrets. I had two years of survival bills saved, and we almost ran out before we fundraised. I had to put about $10k in for cloud bills and such prior to us being able to pay our minimal expenses out of revenue, we paid ourselves back for the loan when we fundraised by decided not to back pay ourselves in order to hire.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#18I did this. What made it possible was two years worth of savings, a very understanding wife, and chronic sleep deprivation. It’s possible, just don’t be stupid about it.
Your mileage may vary.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#19At 34 (but with no kids) I agreed with my wife that I could have 4 years with a sanity check at the end of year 2. I also agreed that it would be an ABSOLUTE rule that I could not put any of my own money into the company. This included the $10 for buying the first domain. I ended up selling 20% of my company to a friend for $5k when it was just weekend hacking with him getting diluted to a $2.5m valuation once I've b…
> I also arranged to leave my previous employer with a 6-figure exit payment. How does that even work?
Throughout my career I'd survived 7 redundancy rounds. One time I chose not to survive. When management raised the idea of moving my team to Ireland I negotiated for exit payment rather than making the usual case about how important my role was.
Re: Ask HN: How do you start a startup in your 30s when you have wife/kids/mortgage?
#20My very concrete feelings on this is that you probably don't. Asking folks how to do this is a bit like asking billionaires how to get rich. It's a fun story but it's overfitting. The individual narrative that made a billionaire is unlikely to be available for you. If you ask some millionaires they may be more likely to give you some useful advice around sound investment strategies, living within your means, and iden…
I agree with the premise of this, but want to point out a normal job doesn’t necessarily lead to fulfilling those responsibilities adequately even though maybe they should. People still get stressed, overwork, have ambition, dislike home life, etc. I think OP should talk with his wife and make a decision based on milestones
I agree with you on both points:
1. If it's a bad job that pays well but makes you miserable, that's a different situation. I assumed that was not the case but I may have been hasty.
2. No matter what, discussing with your partner is absolutely the right thing. But really discussing and coming together to try to come to a shared understanding. You never know, their tolerance for risk may be even higher than yours!