I don't have a clue, tell me if you find out. I suspect that others who say "just put yourself out there" or whatever either don't know how hard it is, or they live in some kind of artist colony metropolis where everyone is on the same wavelength. I personally do a lot of things in public (gym, cafes, outdoors, shows), and I have spontaneous conversations with strangers once a month at best.
Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
11–20 of 31 posts
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#12Mostly by joining groups of people in social activities.
E.g. Going to the gym, doing some sports, attending meetups & conferences
You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar.
Some important factors to form friendships are: spending often time together, overcoming challenges together and having common interests. So look for activities that involve these factors. As you can now see, sports are good at this.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#13Mostly by joining groups of people in social activities. E.g. Going to the gym, doing some sports, attending meetups & conferences You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar. Some important factors to form friendships are: spending often time together, overcoming challenges together and having common interests. So look for acti…
> You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar.
A word of caution though, if you make friends at a bar, all your friends will be people who hang out at bars. May make your life a bit more Norm Peterson than planned.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#14I don't have a clue, tell me if you find out. I suspect that others who say "just put yourself out there" or whatever either don't know how hard it is, or they live in some kind of artist colony metropolis where everyone is on the same wavelength. I personally do a lot of things in public (gym, cafes, outdoors, shows), and I have spontaneous conversations with strangers once a month at best.
Me too. I did a bit of solo travel and it drove me nuts. Even though I did get some social interaction. Nomadding may not be for everyone I guess.
If it were me I would do a side project startup with someone else, a common goal is always a good thing where you might get close to someone.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#15Mostly by joining groups of people in social activities. E.g. Going to the gym, doing some sports, attending meetups & conferences You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar. Some important factors to form friendships are: spending often time together, overcoming challenges together and having common interests. So look for acti…
> You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar. A word of caution though, if you make friends at a bar, all your friends will be people who hang out at bars. May make your life a bit more Norm Peterson than planned.
Haha yeah but you could also meet occasional bar-goers if you only visit the bar in weekends. I've met very different kinds of people in bars.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#16Earlier quoted context omitted.
> You could also just go to a bar, it would work too but it'd be more difficult generally. Shyness also doesn't make it happen in a bar. A word of caution though, if you make friends at a bar, all your friends will be people who hang out at bars. May make your life a bit more Norm Peterson than planned.
Haha yeah but you could also meet occasional bar-goers if you only visit the bar in weekends. I've met very different kinds of people in bars.
Well, statistically, the people you are most likely to meet in a bar are the people that are most likely to be in a bar.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#17Get a hobby outside of work. Mine is English standup comedy (I live in Taiwan). There’s only 10-15 people really doing it here but its easy to make friends naturally by showing up consistently every week. This goes for any hobby too.
Performing arts are my favorite because building comradery when you’re all on stage together happens naturally.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#18Often had this problem as a nomad (sometimes you find people you click with, but sometimes it's really lonely) and as I couldn't find any good app that would allow me to easily find people I actually liked between locations and to keep in touch with them as I moved on, I co-founded Revity App which helps remote workers and nomads find others who share their hobbies, connect online and then meet offline!
We need beta testers (I am about to make a post about this on here) so would be awesome to have you there for free: https://community.revityapp.com/plans/245832?bundle_token=83...
We're focused on people who like the outdoors, because 1. that's what we both love, 2. there's something about people who like outdoor sports and adventure activities that makes us get along with each other, across cultures and age.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#19Having been a remote worker for close to a decade, I've tried a lot of approaches. The best one I've found has been classes. Sign up for classes at a community college. Or language classes. Or sculpting classes. Anything that sounds interesting.
The real goal is to make sure you get to talk to people multiple times. That's the way you build relationships. One off meetings rarely lead to anything.
Re: Ask HN: How do you build a social circle as a remote worker/nomad in a new city?
#20Earlier quoted context omitted.
i feel like it isn’t a realistic expectation to expect somebody to come out of their comfort zone and be somebody they aren’t (“be the person that …”)
I'm not that afraid to go out of my comfort zone but if I spontaneously talked to random people there is a good chance they'd see me as a dangerous lunatic given how weird I can be lol
There's nothing wrong with a bit of eccentricity, but of course people have limits. The ability to have impromptu conversations with strangers is a life skill worth learning. Being a bit weird or silly is endearing. Having it as a handicap in social situations, however, is a weakness