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Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

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Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#11

Post by hehsjsbb »

gjvc wrote: post #10
hehsjsbb wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Ironically I'm a "implementation is 9/10ths of the law" believer, the proposals were PRs and working demos. Despite being a small start-up the team is not really into iterative development so much as lots of up-front planning and theory followed by big polished PRs. I agree if I'm going to succeed I'll need to change my approach. I usually learn by doing and experimenting but it's tough to make incremental changes he…

Wow. That's tough. If a working demo doesn't convince them, I'm not sure what will. "See this? Do you want this?" is a pretty simple question. Do they need more evidence of unit- and integration testing? Do they need some/more user feedback before proceeding? Remember, some people don't listen to reason, some of your wise seed will fall on rocky ground, and don't try to teach a pig to sing. I'll stop now :-) Best of…

It's mostly code quality / style / archtectural objections. Some of which are understandable since I'm new to the codebase and it's a prototype to show the feature, but taken together all the feedback basically rewrote the entire feature. I've pretty consistently had better experiences contributing to large open source codebases than getting a feature into this codebase so I don't necessarily think it's that I'm bad at receiving feedback?

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#12

Post by burntoutfire »

> I took some time off and tried to come at it with a clear head, but there have already been a few discouraging situations where I feel like my coworkers don't respect me. The work that I have done doesn't seem meaningful, it's kind of "leftovers" that nobody else on the team wants to do.

It's called "paying your dues" and exists in all industries. You need to earn respect of your new colleagues by doing some of that shitty work and doing it well. If all goes well, in a couple of months you'll be a part of the in-group and will get the interesting tasks.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#13

Post by rboyd »

Step 1: Realize this says more about the team/org than it says about you. Don't internalize much of this. Recall some of the most difficult projects you've taken on successfully. If you have something to be proud of, remember that you actually are pretty talented.

Step 2: Consider that there's a high probability that you were hired to clean up the mess. Maybe your teammates would like nothing more than for you to jump on the grenades so they can tackle the high-profile projects and get the promotions. In this context it probably starts to make more sense what's happening here. Giving negative feedback is a cheap and easy way for your teammates to signal to management what the ranking order is (especially if management is non-technical or too busy to look at the details).

Step 3: Decide if it's worth staying. This could mean playing the long game. It could mean having a strategy to rep up with management behind the scenes. It could mean doing the hard work of shoveling in the trenches and playing code janitor to earn the respect. It could just mean collecting the paychecks and associating less of your identity with this job while you pursue hobbies, family, whatever else.

Spend some time with your teammates on a social level and find some common ground. If you all like each other first it's easier to work together and harder to criticize.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#14

Post by toomuchtodo »

burntoutfire wrote: post #12

> I took some time off and tried to come at it with a clear head, but there have already been a few discouraging situations where I feel like my coworkers don't respect me. The work that I have done doesn't seem meaningful, it's kind of "leftovers" that nobody else on the team wants to do. It's called "paying your dues" and exists in all industries. You need to earn respect of your new colleagues by doing some of tha…

Following on to this, earning the trust of your colleagues takes time and effort. “Paying your dues” doesn’t capture the nuance in my opinion.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#15

Post by hehsjsbb »

burntoutfire wrote: post #12

> I took some time off and tried to come at it with a clear head, but there have already been a few discouraging situations where I feel like my coworkers don't respect me. The work that I have done doesn't seem meaningful, it's kind of "leftovers" that nobody else on the team wants to do. It's called "paying your dues" and exists in all industries. You need to earn respect of your new colleagues by doing some of tha…

I said this in another thread but I've been in the industry for 10 years. I don't expect to come in and rearchitect things on day 1, but I expect the tasks to be meaningful. The stuff I'm working on isn't an on-ramp to bigger tasks or being better integrated with the rest of the team, it's a silo that nobody wants to touch.

If your perspective is that onboarding is basically hazing people have to do to fit in at your company, I think that's pretty messed up. The best places I worked at tried to get people to ship meaningful features that would have an impact quickly.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#16

Post by hehsjsbb »

rboyd wrote: post #13

Step 1: Realize this says more about the team/org than it says about you. Don't internalize much of this. Recall some of the most difficult projects you've taken on successfully. If you have something to be proud of, remember that you actually are pretty talented. Step 2: Consider that there's a high probability that you were hired to clean up the mess. Maybe your teammates would like nothing more than for you to jum…

Thanks! This whole discussion has definitely made me focus on #1 and helped with my imposter syndrome.

I think #2 is probably too 3D chess for an org this small and flat. It really seems like this is just the culture and maybe it works for some people? I'm not a man so I'm kind of excluded by default as well.

#3 is definitely the big question - I don't think toiling away is going to earn respect, but it will get me a paycheque. It's funny that people on here seem to think getting assigned shitty tasks will make people think you're a rockstar instead of, you know, the person who does all the shitty tasks. In my experience that kind of reputation is self-perpetuating and, as you say in #2, not really recognized or promotable.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#17

Post by terminalcommand »

hehsjsbb wrote: post #11
gjvc wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wow. That's tough. If a working demo doesn't convince them, I'm not sure what will. "See this? Do you want this?" is a pretty simple question. Do they need more evidence of unit- and integration testing? Do they need some/more user feedback before proceeding? Remember, some people don't listen to reason, some of your wise seed will fall on rocky ground, and don't try to teach a pig to sing. I'll stop now :-) Best of…

It's mostly code quality / style / archtectural objections. Some of which are understandable since I'm new to the codebase and it's a prototype to show the feature, but taken together all the feedback basically rewrote the entire feature. I've pretty consistently had better experiences contributing to large open source codebases than getting a feature into this codebase so I don't necessarily think it's that I'm bad…

They might be seeing you as a threat, because they think you might be trying to steal their light.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#18

Post by gjvc »

terminalcommand wrote: post #17
hehsjsbb wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's mostly code quality / style / archtectural objections. Some of which are understandable since I'm new to the codebase and it's a prototype to show the feature, but taken together all the feedback basically rewrote the entire feature. I've pretty consistently had better experiences contributing to large open source codebases than getting a feature into this codebase so I don't necessarily think it's that I'm bad…

They might be seeing you as a threat, because they think you might be trying to steal their light.

I used to not want to believe this kind of thing, but when I started to believe in it, quite a few situations became simple to understand.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#19

Post by burntoutfire »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #14
burntoutfire wrote: post #12

> I took some time off and tried to come at it with a clear head, but there have already been a few discouraging situations where I feel like my coworkers don't respect me. The work that I have done doesn't seem meaningful, it's kind of "leftovers" that nobody else on the team wants to do. It's called "paying your dues" and exists in all industries. You need to earn respect of your new colleagues by doing some of tha…

Following on to this, earning the trust of your colleagues takes time and effort. “Paying your dues” doesn’t capture the nuance in my opinion.

Perhaps you're right, English is not my native language.

Re: Ask HN: Overcoming Burnout / Imposter Syndrome

#20

Post by toomuchtodo »

burntoutfire wrote: post #19
toomuchtodo wrote: post #14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Following on to this, earning the trust of your colleagues takes time and effort. “Paying your dues” doesn’t capture the nuance in my opinion.

Perhaps you're right, English is not my native language.

I couldn’t tell, your English is very good. I hope my comment didn’t come across in any way as a sleight, my apologies if so.
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