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Ask HN: How are you holding up?
11–20 of 398 posts
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#12Thanks for asking and hope you are doing well! I unfortunately got dumped by a girl I was dating, lost my job and a (non-nuclear) family member while living in Manhattan, NYC. I thought I was holding up okay but once my gym shut down and social events shut down (before later transitioning to videoconference) my mental state and diet declined fast. The lack of human contact was mitigated to an extent by virtual social…
Sounds like a lot stuff to deal with at the same time. This would be hard for anyone. Hopefully the move back out West feels like a bit of a fresh start and you get back on your feet quickly! :)
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#13Seems less bad to me than the year or so that followed 9/11. Bad and bad enough though.
Its interesting to me that you bring up 9/11 since that was my first thought as well. I remember that time as a surreal haze of watching the news with a near constant "is this real and happening?" thoughts running through my head. I recall the feeling of waking up and how things felt normal again until the realization of the current state of the world washed over me. It took a long time until things felt "normal" again which is crazy considering the wars that were happening and the waste of life that the events led to.
I haven't really had that experience until the last few months. Its just as surreal now as it was then.
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#14I'm doing well. Ironically I think I'm doing better now than I would have been if the pandemic didn't happen; but still not in a particularly good position. Optimistic, though!
If you're struggling, it's probably because the systems that you put in place at the start of the pandemic have broken down. (Kinda like how we eventually forget/give up on New Years Resolutions...)
I'd recommend these[1] two[2] videos from CGP Grey to help. The first talks about the kind of things that you might be doing that are making you miserable, and the second about specific ways in which we can cope with the pandemic (and specifically a lockdown, if you are still in one).
Brief notes:
Avoid doing any of these things:
* Staying still, avoiding exercise
* Having an irregular sleep schedule
* Maximizing screen time; going to sleep looking at your phone, and using it as soon as you wake up
* Encouraging negative emotions, eg: by looking at the news
* Setting unmeasurable or unachievable goals. Waiting for motivation to strike.
* Obsessing over trying to be happy.
* Following your self-destructive impulses
Partition your house/space into the following spaces, and try to obey these rules about the spaces:
* A space for exercise. If you don't have equipment, you can do body weight exercises. If you have access to safe outdoor spaces, make sure to use that too. Make sure you set a minimum amount of time, and stick to it.
* A space for sleep. Do not use your phone here. Do not eat here. Do not linger here. It's just for sleep. If you're failing to sleep, leave and try again later. Setting an alarm to wake up is important to maintaining a consistent sleep schedule. It doesn't matter when you wake up - so long as the time is consistent.
* A recreation zone. Go here to do activities that you actually enjoy. Only do these activities if you intend to give them your full attention. Keep an eye on the quality of the recreation, and make sure you set a maximum time limit.
* A creation zone. Somewhere to work, study, or develop skills. Crafts, coding, cooking. Make sure this space is dedicated; so do not consume entertainment here, do not eat here.
[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO1mTELoj6o [2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snAhsXyO3Ck
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#15Contrary to what I imagined, better than ever.
Work: Incredibly smooth, even if I'm confined to a 13 inch laptop as opposed to 2x 26 inch screens (OK, I occasionally hook up my TV for extra help). Peace, quiet, fully able to focus on my tasks.
Physical health: Several years ago I decided to dedicate a portion of my spare time to sports and I got into my best shape ever by end of last year(body fat ~10%, down from 20+). Which initially got me worried given that gyms were closed and whatnot. So I ended up ordering some weights for exercising at home and I started doing it every day just to make sure I stay in that shape. End result is I've gained a lot of muscle without changing my weight. Body fat probably in the lower to mid 7%.
Mental health: Again - a lot of improvements: I'm not fond of real life interactions and I operate significantly better on my own. I do get mildly pissed off when my phone rings, more so than I used to. On the downside, I constantly run out of books which is becoming incredibly annoying.
Finances: Not dealing with eating out for lunch and dinner anymore. Though my bills have gone up now that I'm home all day long as opposed to just coming in the evening, crashing on the bed and leaving first thing when I open my eyes. I.E. my water bill has gone up 5 times, electricity about 3 times.
Summer: I had some plans, one fell through completely (still unsure if that's good or bad) and the other is almost at the same stage but it might be for the better(it's complicated).
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#16Really badly, but could be worse.
I am entirely sure that I have moderate-serious depression since the lock down started. I rely entirely on external structure and physical separation of spaces to keep myself sane. So WFH has been disastrous for me.
I have been eating worse, not working out, stopped pursuing hobbies/side projects and have been incredibly unproductive at work. Thankfully, a year of good results prior to this, has helped build a lot of goodwill I can burn through.
For the first time the current social climate has affected me severely too. My parents city is among the worst affected by Covid, and both my 80 yr old grandparents stay there. My anti-tribal-free-speech-absolutist and pro-equality-altruistic self have put me in a moral crisis as the BLM movement has picked up. Then today morning my favorite blog closed because of an attack by cancel-police. My country is on the cusp of actual war. I also spilled my coffee twice in the last 2 days and that makes me irrationally frustrated.
On the bright side, I have no suicidal thoughts. None of my relationships have been destroyed (yet). I still have my job and I know the cause of my current state is temporary. I've started therapy, which should start helping any moment now. Covid has affected people in worse ways, so I'm quietly trudging along.
Worst 3 month period of my life outside the one time I was depressed + alone . Now I am just depressed.
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#17An anxious wreck. Working from home, staying isolated because I'm taking care of someone with no immune system. The isolation is killing me. In the last few weeks I've stopped being able to fall asleep half the nights.
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#18Pissed off at work. The workload is up since pre-Corona, management says "do more with less". All of this in addition to the work-unrelated stress.
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#19Thanks for asking and hope you are doing well! I unfortunately got dumped by a girl I was dating, lost my job and a (non-nuclear) family member while living in Manhattan, NYC. I thought I was holding up okay but once my gym shut down and social events shut down (before later transitioning to videoconference) my mental state and diet declined fast. The lack of human contact was mitigated to an extent by virtual social…
You have my sympathy re: the breakup. Why is it "Since my landlord offered no help and my lease is up" instead of " my rent is due, but I can't afford it". You make it sound like the landlord is at fault.
Re: Ask HN: How are you holding up?
#20If you are a knowledge worker with a family - your quality of life may have gone up.
If your job cannot be WFH, you are single and/or you are living in a big city - the quality of life may have gone down.
Can you share more details?