Ask HN: How is your mental health?

Although I am still on A/D meds, I am the best I have been in years because I escaped an emotionally abusive relationship a year ago. Since then, I have reclaimed stability and self-esteem by hitting the gym daily. The freedom to live without that influence is still amazing to me.

Personally I didn't, even though the markers were there. Not from a head-in-sand attitude, more that I did not want it to be a self-conjured certainty by constantly fretting over a 'what-if'. I figured that if lightning was going to strike it would and not worrying about it allowed me several peaceful and productive years. Equally if lightning hadn't struck then I would have spent my time here on earth stressing about something that never happened.

Bad enough to get involuntarily committed. Good enough to say the right things to avoid being committed. Somewhat ironically if I get committed I'll almost certainly off myself because the idea of restarting from being broke, unemployed, and homeless again is a complete non starter.

Therapy is more effective than it has any business being. If you can make it happen, try it.

I’m going to start by saying I have a mood disorder, and I don’t understand anxiety disorders because they’re part of a completely different world from mine. Conversations I’ve had with people that have anxiety disorders have reinforced this idea that I really don’t understand anxiety disorders or relate to them.

The worst parts for me are some times in the past several years when I have moved, changed jobs, changed relationships, and had relatives who passed away. To be clear, when I say “and”, I am talking about many of these things happening at the same time. Having strong relationships, having a therapist, and keeping a regular schedule mean the difference between seeing me as my usual self and seeing me disappear for a few weeks.

I have also decided never again to tell my manager any details about my condition. In the future it is an “unspecified, diagnosed disorder for which I am receiving professional treatment.” I was lulled into a false sense of security by having excellent managers at the beginning of my career and it turns out that I was very lucky; most managers are fairly mediocre and will do damage more often than not if you give them too many details about your mental health. Find somebody else to talk to about it—there are therapists, friends, and support groups e.g. on Facebook.

I can't really think of anyone that DOESN'T have any mental issues. It can be as simple as self-doubt, especially if you're married with kids. I believe men suffer tremendously but never seek the necessary help. I'm lucky enough that my employer allows for free sessions, and I have and will continue to seek treatment since I benefited so much.

It's important to note that you HAVE to want it. If you have any bit of doubt or skepticism, it will work against you.

Just accept it as someone looking to really help and it will help!