Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

Throwaway for obvious reasons. I work for a company doing interactive media work (think conferences touch screens, cool-ish 3D websites, museum-like installations and such). The company specializes in short films / adverts but we have a small interactive department (~6 people) that I am the head of.

It's a small company which grew very quickly - I became the head of the department because I was one of the first developers at the company and basically created and sold our first interactive projects. With time, we pitched more and more of those, and here we are today. As a result of this the company lacks a lot of structure and "middleware" positions - e.g. I do all the hiring myself, and while we do have marketing / project managers, their knowledge is tailored towards films / adverts and don't have a strong knowledge about projects with a programming-heavy background.

The thing is, I've tried and tried to do the best job I can but I just don't enjoy management. I can deal with clients fine, but I don't like having to check on others to ensure they're working as they should. I don't like hiring people and doing interviews. I don't like having to worry about "capacity" when getting a new project. I don't like doing performance reviews and making sure that people's "efficiency" is as high as. I don't like having to supervise every proposal going out to make sure our marketing department didn't promise some technical heresy. I don't like giving people "shitty" tasks to do (because there will always be some). I don't like sitting with someone for a couple hours to explains how I'd like things done, or having to fix something they've done wrong. And of course I don't like being in endless meetings.

I like sitting down and solving problems with code, getting a brief and build something cool. but as of recently I'm lucky if I can allocate 25% of my time to this, while the rest is all these tasks I don't really enjoy.

I tried telling myself that it's a childish and idealistic way of thinking and that it's all a part of career progression regardless of where you work at, giving myself time to try and mature into the position, and trying my best to address all the pipeline issues and technical shortcomings of the company. but it's been a long time now, the way I think about this hasn't changed at all and I feel it's really eating into my mental health now - I find myself procrastinating on tasks like hiring, putting off one-on-ones, and other destructive behaviour.

I've been in the company for a long time and I love the people in it, the culture, and the fact that because of my position I have a lot of freedom to do things the way I want. I'm also quite invested financially as I have some vested shares which should hopefully mature in 4/5 years. But I'm not lying if I say that I haven't woken up with a passion or spring in my step to go to work in a long time and I don't know if I can subject myself to 5 more years of this.

Any advice from people who have been in similar positions?

I am in very similiar position right now, and I have decided to bite the bullet and drop all non individual contributor responsibilities. I'm not yet sure how it will go but it's my #1 priority to arrange it with Cxx. I know this was supposed to feel like "step up" but it's not who I am. I don't aspire to great managers, I respect people like Carmack. I want to be the best and most productive engineer, that's where I have most fun. If the money is similiar, that's what it's about.

Since you seem to have the authority and the freedom, please ask for and hire a manager. As others pointed out, management is not next step to development. They are different skills.

I have switched back and forth and in my current role, I have completely given up on managing people. It is probably a step down in terms of pay, but I am more happier.

In FAANG/larger companies they outline the management track and the staff engineer track. It sounds like you simply want to do the latter - so no, there is nothing wrong or unusual with what you are wanting.

The problem is those roles are harder to find and grow into in smaller and even medium companies. Eng pay tops out unless you gain management responsibilities whereas at those large companies they will pay staff engineers somewhat proportionately to managers.

If your agency is the kind I think it is, the unit economics simply don't allow them to pay you above a certain rate for non management. There also won't be any significant career support.

Research the staff engineer track and if it's something you want to pursue I would consider a move to a larger company into a staff engineer track role, where there are plenty of people who want to be a manager and you can let them right all those battles while you keep your head down and build. You may not be at staff engineer level right now but you will have a career path.

My guess is you are also not being fairly compensated for your talents if you have developed this product line and are essentially the product owner as well. Even more reason to see if you can earn a lot more at a bigger company.

1: Read "The Mythical Man Month," because it describes exactly how to structure a department around people like you. Basically, you're the lead but it's someone else who does the people management. In your case, your higher ups probably aren't familiar with this kind of arrangement and it's on you to educate them. (So you can bring sanity back to your job.)

2: Say very frankly to your superior (CEO, founder, whatever): "I don't want to be a manager." Then, discuss what a manager would do, and how it would reduce your load. (Remember, this is described in "The Mythical Man Month.")

But, if this falls on deaf ears, start interviewing. You don't need to take another job; the point is to signal that you're willing to leave in order to be happy. If you get a counter-offer, you need to be very clear about what must change immediately in order for you to stay. (It doesn't have to be money, BTW.)

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In my case, I was almost pushed covertly into management. I was assigned management tasks without being a manager in title. When I said to my boss, "I don't want to be a manager," the response was that I wasn't, but that I was going to do a bunch of things that sounded like management. I just refused to do the management tasks and went and looked at job openings.

A few days later, after I walked out of an interview, I had a panicked voice mail from my boss. The next day it became clear that the head of the department told him that I was probably going to leave if I was forced into management. Things were fixed overnight.

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Edit: You don't need to take a paycut, nor should you offer to take a paycut, nor should you accept a paycut. You're proven indispensable, and if your company is uptight about specific titles having specific pay, then you should leave.