Ask HN: I'm depressed, what should I do?

2. Spend the first 4 hours of every workday doing your best to get a job.

3. Profit.

You're in no position to be picky right now. Get a job and get the hell out of your parents' house.

Do not chase teh shiny. There is no such thing as a "not-that-interesting tech stack" -- some of the best gigs are writing boring code on boring tech stacks. Might not be sexy but there's satisfaction in producing rock-solid, boring code.

Reliability is interesting.

So is a paycheck.

Suck it up, buttercup. Get a job asap and after a couple years, look for a better one while you're already employed.

It's far easier to get a job when you already have one.

I would lean toward what your family is saying, just get a job. Even if you feel that job is underpaying you and not doing something "exciting". Through this process you should learn about "selling yourself" and what employers want to have in an employee. Talent is important, but talent without being able to properly market yourself won't get you where you want to be.

You are probably not that good. And that's totally fine. You are not your work, and you shouldn't define yourself by your job alone. You are a multifaceted human, complete with all the inherent complexity.

You're still young - you need to get some experience under your belt. That means spending 1 or 2 years at a couple of middle of the road jobs. Unless the role is clearly really poor, then you shouldn't be turning stuff down.

Get some experience, be poor for a bit, spend your last £10 on tequila and go and find somebody to love. Live a bit while you're young, you will grow through time.

There are no shortcuts.

I agree with your family, stop being spoilt and lazy.

So a few things: First, feeling down, rejected, etc., sound pretty normal to me given what you've described. That's not to say that I think that you should simply ride it out, suck it up, etc. If it was that easy there would be a lot less suffering in general. You're clearly cognizant that something's not right, though, and the fact that you're acting on that seems pretty healthy to me.

Try reddit. I can't suggest any specific subs, but I've found the communities that are supportive to be very supportive. If you're struggling with simply reaching out, that's one place I would start.

Yes, please do consider a therapist (or a career coach, etc.). The thing with depression is that it horribly distorts your perspective, and as you've touched on, begins a wicked feedback loop. It can be difficult to dig yourself out of that hole, and digging in can have serious consequences. Getting in touch with someone who can provide accurate information and context about your experience, and how you want to sort things out.

Sunshine and physical activity, as well as getting out in public are excellent moderators of depression. But they're not fixes.

Finally, if you take only one thing from this, I hope it's this: There's nothing wrong with feeling the way you do. There's nothing wrong with seeking out expert opinion on how to manage your life. Depression is manageable, especially episodic depression, such as you describe. Please please don't let yourself fall into the trap of thinking that it's a weakness or a character defect.

I sincerely wish you the best of luck on your journey. Hang in there.